I am an average Joe (or Juan). A widower in his late 30’s living in a physical shell that’s keeping myself old, but nevertheless, I feel young.
We met under a very unusual circumstance. Let us call her Andrea. They say that every man or woman has their own limitations and live by their own choice. I believe that mine has the linkage between these two. And, surprisingly as I came to know her, so is she.
It was a sunny Summer afternoon when we got introduced to each other by a common friend. In this case, her husband. During our meet, I have noticed that Andrea is a woman of simple things. No makeup nor any fancy jewelry. She is not pretentious nor talkative. By lack of words to describe her, one can easily put her to being a timid and shy housewife.
She is about 5’3” with cute soft facial features. She is fair skinned with a bronze-y complexion that definitely radiates under the sun. In our local language, morena. I couldn’t help but notice something about Andrea, and it was her butt, that gives me this tingly sensation all over. Didn’t I tell you? I am at a young ripe age in an old shell.
This particular meet was arranged by my friend, her husband. I bumped into him days prior in a shopping mall. Being an old acquaintance and a friend we saw each other after decades in a lousy mall never knowing each others life story and whereabouts after all those years. We had a good talk and long conversation for that matter catching up stories of the past. What, When and Where.
Cut to the chase, here we are.
Joey, my long lost friend, had been married to Andrea for more than a decade. They had a somehow happy and interesting but rough nomadic life. They have been to places locally and abroad to find their permanent address over the years but to no avail. On the other hand, mine actually dwarfs their struggle. I have been to 5 different continents to find my own career and place to settle. I have a failed marriage, a possibility of having a son that I may never meet, a soul that can’t rest and a mind that never settles. I have always been like this for the most part of my adult life after my marriage, divorce and my ex-wife’s untimely demise. After my divorce, I had in my life a woman who is a dear friend who managed to successfully leave a fresh new heartbreak on top of my fresh wound. Shit! I guess I am a sucker for beautiful and hot women but I have the worst luck in landing a relationship. Or is it something else? I may never know for sure.
Meeting and talking to an old friend on a foreign soil feels like giving you a fresh new beginning. A new perspective. Meeting Andrea, for some reason, has given me more.
During our meet, Joey left the table to order us something. Being talkative that I am and to break the ice, I asked Andrea how are they and I also started narrating my life. I have learned that they got married after their college graduation as she is pregnant at that time.
She is fun to talk to, and easy to be with. Her personality borders the shy type and easy-to-crack attitude. With that very few moment of us alone, it made me feel like a college boy trying to start a conversation with an attractive frat girl from a corner.
That meet drag along for several hours and after a few drinks and some fun conversation we called it a day.
I went to my apartment that day having Andrea in my thoughts. I know that it’s wrong and that she is married but I couldn’t help myself but admire her wit and simple beauty. I added her on Facebook through her husband who is already listed.
I sent her a greeting and added her. To my surprise she added me back. After a few pleasantries I took off for work and so is she. It’s a start. I do not mean to pursue anything at the moment. I just want to gauge myself if: is this a simple spur-of-the-moment infatuation due to lack of women in my life or is it something more? Too early to tell.
Later that day, I received a message from Joey asking for some hand to pick some stuff that he just bought. And he is also insisting on an early dinner and a cold beer. I have nothing else to do and it was my off. Plus the idea of seeing Andrea once again is already teasing me.
Andrea.
We unloaded the IKEA cabinet and small fridge on their apartment that day. Joey invited me to stay for a little snack and perhaps some beer which I gladly accepted. Andrea prepared a meatball and Joey eased up with some cold beers from their old fridge. A few moments have passed and Andrea excused herself. As we are having our chat in the kitchen and Joey preparing some quick fix ‘pulutan’, I noticed Andrea passed by with her bathrobe on and on her hand some sensual-looking change of black lingerie. OH my thoughts! Am I just being too fixated on the sexual desires?
Joey served the sizzling plate and we had a few more hours of catching up conversation. We had a few more drinks and we didn’t notice the time. Conversation lead up to more personal details and to topic came to pass about my life after the divorce. I narrated it as it was and how it happened. Joey is sympathetic though. I know him as much as a brother bakc in the day, and he still is. He listens and always had a calm and open-minded opinion on everything. He would not judge someone easily and always gives the benefit of the doubt. Firm and fair. He would not stop on speaking out his thoughts especially if that is the truth. Plain and simple guy. As for me, I have never been that.
“So how is married life treating you?” I asked.
“Well, it has been tough. Typical husband and wife routine. Work, home and the daily grind. Nothing surprising nor exciting.”
“Bro, by the looks of it and in my point of view, you have a trophy wife and a wonderful life already.”
“Not really. You see, we have had our up’s and down’s. We are making things work only as needed. Patching things up when necessary. Anyway, I just want to let this out of my chest bro… I just want a fresh ear to hear this.”
“Go ahead…” (I said curiously)
“Couple years back, I lost a child.”
“Fuck! I am sorry to hear that. When was this?”
(He shushed me with his fingers on his mouth silencing me. I noticed my voice went up a notch on that one)
“During the lockdown back in the Philippines, I met up with Angela (his ex GF for 6 years according to him). We had some catching up and some intimate time together and 5 months later she had a miscarriage.”
“Sorry. I mean ‘how’?”
“It is what it is bro. A bottle of lousy whiskey and some ‘I have truly missed us’ conversation and you know what happened next. I am not a perfect person nor a saint brfother.”
“I get it. But the miscarriage thing..?”
“She was mine, the baby. Angela missed her period, we went to the doctor, had a check up and all the works.”
“Sorry to ask, how could you know that it was yours?”
“Angela’s dad is a member of the hospital board, he pulled some strings to test the baby. He knows me and we had a DNA sampling. It all checked out. He was more sorry than I am knowing that his first grandchild died.”
“I am truly sorry to hear all this. Does your wife know?”
“She knows that I met my ex. But the spin of the story was; Angela told me that we had a baby who died at childbirth. And the timeline was before I married my wife.”
“Shit bro. That is some serious stuff. How did she take it, your wife?”
“Mad. But she understands that it wasn’t my fault for not knowing things about my child. And it wasn’t my fault that the baby died. I feel guilty though.”
“Now that is getting heavy brother. Why not come clean?”
“I am scared to think of her reaction, although I think that she is somehow aware of some things that I have ommitted in the story.”
“And..?”
“Nothing. I am just letting things go. Maybe it’s my guilt trip”
“Probably. (I agreed) Bro, just let things go. If you want my opinion, all I can say is that everything has been done. History is all that matters now. And you cannot undo it. I have never been good at any relationships bro but I have learned one thing during my time, it is easier to let things happen the they should. Undoing your words would make more complication, don’t you think?”
“Yeah right. I thought about the complications that would follow. Another lie after the other won’t make it any better.”
“Exactly my point.”
It’s 11:30 pm. I didn’t notice the time. Nor did Joey. And we had 3 6-packs already.
He asked me to stay for the night and I agreed. I am tipsy and can’t drive. If I will, I might be at risk of running on with the police.
I have been lying on their sofa bed for hours now and I couldn’t sleep. My thoughts are with Andrea. Is Joey banging her right now? Is she enjoying her time? I gotta stop thinking like this. But I couldn’t. She is too gorgeously appealing for my appetite to dismiss. Those curves and shapely figure, firm butt and radiant skin is elegantly infused in her physicality. I am staring at their ceiling and these are keeping me up despite my intoxication.
Few more minutes and I passed out.
The next thing I knew was my phone vibrating on my pocket and I have an incoming call from work. It was still my day-off but they are simply notifying me of a double shift starting that night. Nevertheless, I said yes. Not knowing much detail nor anything about what time of day is it already.
I checked the time, it was 8:30 in the morning.
“Goodmorning Kuya.”
That sweet voice.
“Hi, I’m sorry I passed out last night.”
“It’s Ok. Joey left early for work. He is getting the early morning shift.”
“I see. I am also heading home now. I am truly sorry to bother you guys.”
“I have prepared a small breakfast and black coffee.”
The food smells wonderful and the coffee even more. I headed towards the sink to wash whatever shit is in my mouth washed my face with coldwater and I am set.
“Please have a seat” Andrea offered. It is unmistakable that she is not wearing a bra those little nips are a sight to see on her robe. My imagination took off and wondered how do they look like. Her breasts are not saggy. They look firm and well-rested on her chest. Not too big. Just a handful I suppose.
We sat together, began to devour our food and then coffee afterwards.
“The coffee smells good, they taste even better.” I began.
“I like them roasted and strong. How was last night? Did you sleep well?”
“Yes, (I lied. I wanted to say ‘I was thinking about you last night and I am thinking of your breasts right now and how good they are to be sucked’)… I had at least some rest and slept well. I hope I didn’t snore.”
“No, not really. hahaha” (her laugh was infectious and I laughed as well)
We had a start in our little chat time and she began to share some talks of their life and their decision to move. Accoridng to her, she was the one who pushed Joey to move and live in Europe and to my surprise, it was all because of Joey’s ex.
Was she listening last night? Did she hear our conversation? I pretended to listen closely but my mind is racing with my imagination. I am thinking of getting a refreshing cold shower with Andrea, naked in all her glory and I am kissing every part of her nakedness. I must admit, I am having a full erection now. What if I suddenly kiss her? Would she react violently? Woiuld she give in? All these things are in my head and I can’t help but relish it.
Andrea was saying something…
“huh? (I absent-mindedly asked)
She was quick to catch and respond “I am asking about your plans, how did you come up with ending up here in Europe?”
“Maybe soul searching. Just like yours. Fresh start.”
“I think everyone these days are all into fresh and new beginnings.”
“You can say that.” I simply responded. Then I openly told her my life. I didn’t notice that it was the longest sensible conversation I had with a woman plus my openness to her gave it a more valuable touch and a comforting snote on my part. Then I realized, ‘I have to open up more to other people once in a while.’
I noticed the wall clock. It’s already noontime. And I suddenly blurted “You know what, I would love to talk to you more. I haven’t had any real conversation like this not even to my dearly departed ex.”
And we both laughed. I realized what I just said and I apologized to her for being so direct. “Nevermind, and it’s fine. There are very few people to go around here anyways.” she answered.
I thanked her for the breakfast and coffee. Waved our goodbyes and left my regrds to Joey.
That night at work, I had my thoughts back in the morning time when we are seated and having a breakfast together along with my erotic thoughts of Andrea “…what if?”
It’s half past 10:00 in the evening and I thought of a good way to open a chat with her at this hour.
[Goodevening Andrea, I hope I am not bothering you at this hour. I am having a plan for my birthday next weekend and I plan to invite you over with Joey. Or whoever is available. I hope you could come]
Surprisingly she answered.
[Hi Joe, of course. I will let him know too]
[Thank you. It would be great if you could come]
After a few moments she texted me back.
[Hi Joe, Joey will be having his work that day. I can drop by though]
[I understand. I would appreciate it if you could come. Just a simple dinner and some wine]
[Sure, I’ll see you then. Advance Happy Birthday to you!]
[Thanks Andrea]
I wasn’t expecting much on that day (it would be a Saturday afternoon) except that I will be preparing some food for people and I am not really expecting any one to come. Except for Joey and Andrea. In this caseh, it’s only her. BETTER.
My Weekend Celebration.
6:00 Pm and people started to arrive. Matter of fact, there are only two who came. And Andrea would be my third and (for me) my VIP.
Two friends and fellow kabayans spent less than a couple of hours since they are pulling an early Sunday shift and went home. I couldn’t shake the idea of being alone with Andrea and I am too thrilled to be with her. Is it the simple conversation that I feel we’re connected? or the fact that I have this yearning to be with a woman? I cannot determine. I just like the idea of her being around. And just the two of us.
I started opening up to Andrea as I showed my friends their way out. “Well they are our guests, at least I have some people to celebrate with me. I hope you enjoyed the food.”
“Ah yes. It was good. I like pasta and the steak was soft.”
I have a couple of wine already and I am feeling the kick of it.
“Wine?” I offered her.
“Sure. It tastes sweet actually. Not too bitter.”
“I am glad you liked it.” As I poured more on her glass. I noticed her face seems a bit flushed or is it the alcohol? “Please tell me if you feel like having to do anything. I understand you are just out from work.”
“No I am fine. Thanks. The wine tastes good and it’s making me feel calm at least. haha…”
That laugh..
“I am glad that you came over, I was also hoping that Joey could come.”
“Nah.. he’s too busy about his new work. All these stuff and the moving in makes him feel clouded and somewhat annoyed.”
“Perhaps adjusting. I am still in that stage you know.”
“OH yes. If I may ask, I hope you don’t mind, what happened to your ex?” She is now a bit tipsy and somewhat red-faced. But she keeps track of her actions and words. I told her how it all began and how it miserably ended.
“I am truly sorry for that. I mean, you could have done well, the two of you.”
“Not really no. During our time together, we had our differences. We tried in vain to face those things but we really cannot fix something that we are not both interested to fix.” I said. Andrea looks sympathetic and her face turned so soft-looking and warm. We are both fixated on our chair and looking at our wineglasses, thinking of what to say next. And I started,
“What about you and Joey? Now if you don’t mind me asking, you mentioned last time about your marriage – and something more? I do not mean to pry on your life. Just don’t mind answering it if you’re uncomfortable.”
But Andrea narrated me the whole story and how she thinks that Joey is hiding some more in his closet. She is aware that there is some more on Joey’s story and that he is keeping it from her. She said,
“I feel like I was cheated and still being cheated upon..”
“What made you say that?” I asked
“Woman’s intuition perhaps.”
I could only shrug and sympathize. Not every relationship has a smooth sailing wind on them.
It was 9:00 PM and I told her that I could drive her home. Despite the timely and punctual Euro bus lines around the city, I feel like I am obliged to send her home. She checked her phone and excused herself for the toilet. I noticed that she is wobbly on her steps on her way to the toilet.
A few moments have passed and I noticed that she had a change of clothes.
“I am sorry I have to change my attire. It was my uniform, and I couldn’t change it earlier.”
“It’s OK.” I simply added. Now, her cute face was all fresh-looking and her seemed to glow a bit. I couldn’t help but compliment her tight jeans and that curve was mesmerizing. And I added,
“Now that looks stunning..” I seem to be absent-mindedly blurt it out. But I did. Upon uttering those words, she blushed. I am certain, it is not the wine. Her face turn a little red and flushed. “I am sorry, but I couldn’t help. You look great and relaxed.”
“Wow! Thanks for the compliment. I want to think that you are not joking as I haven’t heard anyone say that.” hahaha (her nervous, sarcastic laugh)
“No. Seriously. I am all for women who are not trying hard to do anything about their face and body. You know those body modification etc.. I like au naturel looks. And I mean it. No joke.” Then I added some furhter explanation to it, as if I am trying to redeem and justify something bad that I might have said: “If you would ask me, women should embrace their body as they age. Eat clean, exercise and stay simple. As for you, you look so fine for a woman your age. You have kids but at first glance, it doesn’t show. You are somewhat into a healthy lifestyle, I heard from Joey. I respect that. I like that.” These words are the truth. I don’t how I started babbling them out of my talkative mouth but then again, I have spoken them like a preacher.
“What can I say? I am out of words but Thank you.” Now she is really blushing.
“You know, Joey was lucky to have you. You look gracious and stunning. You are fun to be with Andrea.” I gulped a glassful of wine. I don’t know what was I thinking at that moment but I poured her some more. And she accepted….