Lamentation: Letting Go Of My Not So New Wife

***This story is entirely fictional. Any person or event in this story that is similar to real life is completely coincidental.***

Seconds turn to minutes, minutes turn to hours, hours turn to day, days turn to months… and so on, and so on, and so on. Waiting is such a painful pleasure. Jaime will be back next week. Finally, for long eight months, Ken will, again feel the warmth of his wife’s body. “This is the reality of life son,” tinig ni Armand. “Dad, I am excited to see her,” si Ken. “I know, but it doesn’t really matter. It is true that when you see her, you will be happy, but what will happen after that? After you feel the pleasure, and happiness when you see her, what will happen? What’s next? Nothing really. When you are happy, the most painful truth, is that it will fade. And the happiness will become a memory.” “I know dad. But I can live with that. A beautiful memory is worth the pain.” “Son, you need to let her go,” his mother said. “Kuya, you will be fine if even if she’s gone.” He couldn’t figure out whose voice said it. “Let her go. Let her go. Let her go.” “Let her go.” This time, he knew it was Jaime’s voice. It came from a door. He went and entered the door, and found stairs spiraling downwards. He can say that the voice is from down below. He needs to find Jaime.

As he walks down the metal stairs, the sound of his footsteps ring in his ears loudly. Reverberating inside the room. He noticed that he isn’t the only one walking down the stairs. Next to him is Violet, followed by Armand, Emma, Richie, Aida, and Alfred. They were looking at him from above. Everyone of them was silent. Every time he takes a step, they take a step too. He tried going backwards, they went backwards too. He is not sure what’s happening. But ultimately, he knows what to do.

***

Ken opened his eyes. There are rays of light escaping the curtains, a sign that he had good sleep. When he looked at the clock, it’s still only 7am in morning. Which means, he managed two hours. Good enough, he thought. He closed his eyes again and tried to go back to sleep.

On his way to sleep, Ken re-imagined the time he met Jaime. She was a model. In the field, prositution is rampant. Ken was drafted, after his father’s, or rather his brother’s company recieved an invitation to send a representative to serve as judge (and of course send money as sponsor) in a beauty pageant. That’s when he saw his future wife. The first thing he asked, was if Jaime accepts money? He anonymously offered her a one night stand, but she refused the money, no matter how much it was. That made Ken happy. Jaime refused to meet him many times, until Ken made a donation in exchange for a date. Jaime gave it a shot. Long story short, they became a couple, and Ken showered Jaime with gifts. Jaime wasn’t a virgin when they fell in love. She told Ken, and he just laughed it off. Virginity is the most insignificant part of a woman’s life, Ken said. Jaime had doubts. She asked Ken many times if it was only for sex that he courted her. Ken assured her as much as he could, but Jaime was doubtful. That was the time Ken promised her not to have sex with her until marriage. Then she met Alfred. The most jaw dropping, awesome guy she saw. Alfred took her on a date, under the pretext that he wants to know Ken’s future wife. Ken was excited, because he knew Jaime will captivate his brother soul. He wants her to win Alfred’s approval.

Ken waited in the hotel lobby. He was directly facing the door of the restaurant where Ken and Jaime were dining. It’s a rule that the restaurant will be closed off, and blinds will be drawn when Alfred is dining. So Alfred and Jaime had the restaurant to themselves.

After 9pm, Jaime messaged Ken that she was ready for him. But it wasn’t until 11pm when Jaime and Alfred finished. Jaime looked tired. And the enthusiastic smile on her face was absent. Alfred on the other hand looked smug. But Ken did not suspect at the time. Ken talked to Alfred about Jaime. All Alfred could say was, she’s a tramp whore, and her only purpose is to be fucked. That hurt Ken. But he defended her, and married her anyway. Alfred couldn’t care less. He was going to separate them from each other anyway.

Slowly, Jaime started to love money. She fell in love with luxury. Ken gave her that, but it was always through the approval of Armand who was commanded by Alfred. Jaime knew that. Then she went to visit Ken in their estate. She was made mistress of the house by Alfred temporarily. Her whims and desires must be followed at all cost. Alfred sent Ken away for a few days, at the request of mistress Jaime. Alfred gave her that much power.

While dressed in a long sleeping gown, “made for rich people” she thought, Jaime ate grapes and strawberries. She also fed her king of course. She then saw Armand entering the room, naked, wearing a thong, on his knees, with his hands put together, coming near Alfred. Armand begged Alfred. He wanted to know how good Jaime’s pussy juice is. Jaime laughed at him. Alfred did not even look at him. Armand only caught his attention, when he kissed Alfred’s feet. Absolute submission. Alfred looked at Jaime, and asked her if the mistress would like to try another cock. Of course he could make her do that, but the game dicates that the mistress must be followed. Jaime considered it for a moment, then nodded. In the same seat, she allowed Armand to lick her pussy. After that Armand took out a 10 long inches black dildo. At that moment, Alfred only allowed him to cum, if the dildo was inside his anus. Armand took on the dildo. He pushed it against his ass. Slowly, when it hit the deepest part of his ass, he then masturbated. Jaime thought he was pathetic, and she was disgusted by him.

At that time, Alfred went out of the country. She left Jaime hanging, so she looked for another person to dominate her. Interestingly, Armand rose to the challenge. Alfred gave him the blessing of being the head of the house while he was gone. Armand was again boss. He tried to sound like Alfred. He tried to walk like Alfred. He tried to make gestures like Alfred does. Jaime made fun of him, because it became a fantasy of Armand, to become like Alfred. She saw how Alfred, Armand, and Richie dominated the women in the house. Jaime did not want to be like the girls, so she promised Richie that he will only be able to fuck her, after her wedding. As soon as they landed on the estate after the honeymoon, Richie bent her and fucked her. After the welcome dinner of the newlywed, Richie fucked her again after Ken went to sleep.

Ken made everyone tell him the entire story of how things came to be. He wanted to know every detail.

***

When Ken opened his eyes, it was already 12nn. He did not fell asleep. Not even a second. But he was amazed how fast time goes. He was served lunch. Later on, he went out, and drove to his new business site. After Jaime and Alfred left for a trip around the world, Ken left the big companies given to him by Alfred. Armand had to take over. Alfred was angry initially and wanted to come home to punish Ken. But Jaime managed to persuade her that sending Ken nudes, videos of them fucking, and their photos of them chilling and happy, are punishment enough. Jaime updated Ken everyday. She sent him all kinds of things. Things that the two of them should be doing, Ken thought. Ken established a recycling business. It was a mid scale business. Earning millions, but not enough for the likes of Alfred, and Jaime too. But he was determined to establish the business. He wanted to call something his.

Ken frequented a therapist. The shrink was a married woman, with four kids. Living a happy life with a police major. Her name is Winona. Winona spent 2 months penetrating the real mind of Ken. They have been talking. Ken told her his problems, but it wasn’t until Ken hid away from her, that she became a true friend, and consequently, managed to pull him up from the spiral stairs. Ken told her everything.

Winona got emotional, looking at someone as gentle as Ken being corrupted, and destroyed by the spiral stairs. She cursed Alfred, verbally abused him, and encouraged Ken to leave them. Winona promised to protect him.

Winona is a 36-year old curvy lady. She was 5’8 tall. Intimidating, and strong. She liked to dye her hair gold. She maintained it at shoulder length. She is loyal, and a good mother. Ken warned her. Alfred will conquer her, if she doesn’t stay away from him. Winona promised Ken. She will not be taken by Alfred. No matter what.

***

Naka tayo ngayon sina Ken at ang pamiliya niya sa isang hangar. Sa harap nila ang isa sa mga private planes ng pamiliya nila. Sakay ng eroplano si Jaime at Alfred. Excited ang lahat, maliban kay Ken at Emma. Alam nilang dalawa kung ano talaga ang lulan ng eroplano sa harap nila.

Naka makalabas ng eroplano ang dalawa, magka iba ang naging reaction nila. Alfred’s brow creased. He is surprised to see the physical change in his brother. Nagpakalbo si Ken. Tanned skin. Wearing a shabby jacket, and blue jeans. He looked like a thief. Jaime on the other hand, is enthusiastic. Tumakbo siya at niyakap ang asawa.

“OH MY GOD BABE! I missed you!” salubong ni Jaime. She expected Ken would be happy, after a long time not seeing each other. When she broke the hug, Ken’s face was stoic. Walang emosyon.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” usisa ni Jaime.

“Clearly, he is devastated, because…” hindi niya natapos ang sasabihin niya, matapos siyang kurotin ni Aida.

“Kumusta son!?” bati ni Armand.

“Freddy, my son, you got fat,” si Violet.

“Hi kuya! I missed you!” si Aida.

They were all smiles. They expected a warm return from Alfred, but instead, he walked past them towards the car. Alfred did not say anything to his family. He did not care about them. They were left emabarassed.

Jaime said her hi to everybody, and then held Ken’s hand. Naglakad sila papunta sa kotse.

“Babe! sa amin kana sumabay ni Freddy,” aya ni Jaime.

“No, I have my own car. Come with me. We need to talk.”

“Babe, alam mo naman na we can’t decide on such things. Mag papaalam muna ako kay Freddy ha. Wait lang.”

Tumalikod si Ken papunta sa kotse niya, hindi niya inantay si Jaime na makapag paalam. Pag sakay niya sa driver seat, nakita niya si Jaime na ngumiti sa kanya. Indication na pumayag si Alfred. Lumapit si Jaime sa kotse niya, ngunit bago pa niya mabuksan ang pinto, ay umabante si Ken. Bumarurot siya ng takbo, at nakita niya ang kanyang asawang naiwang nakatayo.

Pag dating nila sa estate, dumrecho sila sa hapag kainan kung saan may handa. There were all sorts of food. Ken looked at his phone and opened social media. Inaaliw ang sarili, habang nag hihintay na dumating at maka settle down ang mga kasama. Ilang sandali pa ay dumating ang nagdadabog na si Jaime.

“Babe, anong problema mo? Just when Alfred granted me permission to be with you, lalayasan mo lang ako? Kailan pa to? Kailan ka pa nag simulang tumapang ha!”

Emma heard Jaime. She was furious.

“Ever since you left him, ate. He is no longer the same man you married.”

“What do you mean by that?”

Pumasok si Alfred sa dining room. Wala parin siyang imik. Ngunit nang makaupo, pinag masdan niya ang kanyang kapatid.

“As I’ve said, we need to talk,” kalmadong turan ni Ken. Kumalma si Jaime, at tinitigan ang asawa.

“Okay boss. If that’s what you want.” Akmang hahalikan niya sa labi si Ken, ngunit nag salita si Ken, kay hindi niya na ituloy.

“You must’ve enjoyed your travels big brother?” si Ken kay Alfred.

“Yes,” Alfred answered in a condescening tone.

“Yes little brother. We enjoyed our travels,” Alfred confirmed.

“Did you fuck another married woman?”

Aflred’s face was stoic. And the room was full of tension.

“Yes. I have. Why is that little brother? Are you interested in following my foot steps?”

Ken chuckled.

“Oh please big brother. I’d rather kill myself than lose my humanity.”

Alfred’s facial expression changed. It was bordering on anger and curiousity. He’s finally standing up for himself, Alfred thought to himself.

Nag simula silang kumain. Violet, Armand, Aida, and Richie quizzed Jaime. They asked her where they went, and if it was good.

“Wow ate! gusto ko ring pumunta sa north pole. Everybody told me it wasn’t nice,” si Richie.

“Well, it really depends. Freddy and I spent the entire time hugging together. Sobrang lamig doon. And also, we enjoyed Norway too. We went to Svalbard.”

“Yeah, I went there too. I did not enjoy it,” singit Aida.

“Hindi kasi, Svalbard is not a place for a three-day vacation. You have to stay there for months, to enjoy the place.”

“I suppose so,” balik ni Aida.

They went on talk about the places where they visited. For the family, vacation in other countries is normal. They were born rich. It was Jaime’s first time to travel for a long period of time, on the other hand.

While talking, Armand rang the glass with his spoon. at tumayo.

“It has been months since my family is complete again. I would like to offer a toast. To my son Freddy, to my beautiful daughter in law, Jaime, welcome home.” everyone raised their glasses except Alfred and Ken. Ken did not even bother to pick up a glass, he just stared at his father. While Alfred did not raise his glass. When everybody took a sip from the wine, shivers went down their spines. Alfred poured his wine on the floor, while looking at Ken. Napatigil ang lahat.

When Ken noticed, he looked at his brother dead in the eye.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” bulalas ni Alfred kay Ken.

“Nothing is wrong with me big brother. You should not ask me that question. Pero ikaw, everything about you is wrong.”

Tumayo si Alfred. Nilapitan si Ken, at sinuntok sa mukha. No one dared interfere. Dumura ng dugo si Ken, nakangiting tumingin kay Alfred.

“Whoa! This is the first time I felt pleasure. Go on big brother.”

Sinuntok siya ulit ni Alfred. Sinikmuraan. Sinipa, at ibinalibag.

Ken felt amazing. It’s as if, all the pain inside him was released. He needed it. He needed the pain inside to turn physical.

“I am going to kill you. Disrespect me again, and I will forget you are my brother,” turan ni Alfred kay Ken.

Nang maka alis si Alfred, lahat lumapit kay Ken. Tinulungan siyang bumangon. At pinaupo. Agad hinanap ng mga mata ni Ken si Jaime. Ngunit hindi niya ito mahanap. He realized she followed Alfred. He could feel a portion of the pain inside him evaporate. He wanted to feel physical pain, for a very long time. He tried to hurt himself everytime he went inside the spiral stairs. But he felt numb. Nararamdamn lang niya ang hapdi ng mga sakit, pag ginagamot na siya ni Emma, o di kaya ni Violet. But it was different. The pain is different. This time he felt relieved, because he made Alfred feel uncomfortable, and he made him lose his composure. This is his first victory against Alfred. One of the many victories to come.

Alfred looked at everybody in this house like he would a vermin. But not Ken. Alfred is now wary of Ken. Alfred understands that he is a threat. Threat to everything that he created. Threat to his throne. Ken’s rebellion could encourage the others. Emma is already starting to. And he expects that Violet would be next. Alfred knows Armand will always remain his slave. But the others are beginning see light.

***

Ginagamot ni Emma ang mukha ni Ken sa kwarto. Pinainom niya ito ng pain reliever. The last time they had sex was before Jaime and Alfred left. Emma tried to help Ken out of the spiral stairs. But she failed. Violet helped too, but they knew only Ken could get himself out. Emma remembered how she embraced Ken, as he curled himself up in bed, crying for a love lost. She wanted to fuck him, but when she saw his eyes, her lust dissipated. He saw how her kuya Ken looked at her. He looked at her lovingly. He looked at her as if she was the most important thing to him. From then on, the relationship between Ken and Emma, returturned to normal. They no longer felt lust for each other. But their love for each other, is stronger than ever.

“Hi sis!” bati ni Jaime kay Emma, pag pasok niya ng kwarto nila ni Ken.

“What are you doing here?” si Emma.

“What? This is our room. My room. Ikaw?” balik ni Jaime.

“Well, I’m here, loving my brother.”

“Hahaha! You must’ve fucked each other like rabbits while we’re gone.”

“No, we didn’t. Kuya treated me like a real little sister after you left.”

Jaime was surprised. She, looked confused.

“Really? Why?”

“What do you mean why? You must’ve expected us to debase my kuya Ken, so that there woud be no problem, when you come back? Is that right?” si Emma.

“I… Well…”

“HAHAHA! You can’t even lie about it. Leave ate. I’ll take care of kuya.”

“No! I am his wife. I should be taking care of him!”

“Yes, ate you should!”

Akmang sasampalin ni Jaime si Emma, ngunit pinigilan na sila ni Ken.

“Stop it! The both of you!”

“Kuya, I will not let this bitch disrespect you anymore,” si Emma.

“It’s okay Emma. You can leave.” Jaime smiled victory.

“But kuya!” Emma protested, but Ken smiled.

“Don’t you trust me. Did you forget how I defeated Aflred.”

Emma seemed to remember, and smiled at his kuya. He fought Alfred. Jaime would be easy. So Emma, smiled at his kuya, and told him to shout for her if he needs her.

“Babe! I had permission from Alfred to spend the night with you. He regretted hurting you.”

“Jaime, hindi mo kailangan humingi ng permiso kay Alfred kung gusto mong maging asawa ko. Kasal tayo. Sa mata ng dyos, sa mata ng batas.”

“But babe, baka magalit siya?” si Jaime.

“So what? I don’t care anymore. He can kill if he wants, but I am no longer his to torment. I am leaving this house Jaime.”

“Why are you calling me by my name. You never called me Jaime. You always called me babe, love, asawa ko. Diba?”

“I am leaving Jaime.”

“Huh! eh saan naman tayo pupunta? Baka hindi pumayag si Alfred. eh.”

“Haha. I said I am leaving. Alone.”

“WHAT? Iiwanan mo na ako?”

“Yes.”

“Pero diba sabi mo, mahal mo ako.”

“I did! But that was already in the past. I am ready to move on.”

“But babe! Why so sudden? I can’t let you do this.”

“Get out of my room,” utos ni Ken.

“Babe, this is my roo….”

“No. Get out.”

“But babe. I said get out!”

Napilitang lumabas si Jaime. Umiiyak. Hindi niya inaakalang ito ang madadatnan niya pag uwi niya. Labis din ang hinagpis na nararamadaman ni Ken, ngunit alam niyang malalapgasan din niya ito.

***

Kinabukasan…

“I did it! I finally broke free from him!” ika ni Ken na may namumutawing tuwa at ngiti sa kanyang mukha. The first thing he did was to visit Winona, and update her about what happened.

“Really! Oh my gosh! Yes! We have to celebrate! This is really good news. Okay, I am going to take the time off. I will cook for you! Sa bahay kana kumain Ken! And I won’t take no for an answer!” Winona said, jubilantly.

“Haha! Okay,” tugon ni Ken.

Winona played loud music. Her kids were there participating in a victory, they know nothing about.

“I really am glad you broke relationship with your brother. Kasi Ken, you cannot heal in the same environment that broke you. Tulad dito ni hubby. He experienced psychological trauma in being a doctor. After he joined the police, saka lang siya nagkaroon ng new optimism sa buhay niya,” paliwanag ni Winona, habang silay ay kumakain.

“True pare! Being a pedia surgeon is har…