We were reclined on a chase lounge sofa with our knees extended, covered by a blanket from her chest and down to our feet. Nakabalot ang aking mga kamay kay Liz at ang aking mga palad ay nakadantay sa kanyang tiyan. Nakalingon siya sa kaliwa habang nakasandal ang kanyang ulo’t pisngi sa aking dibdib.
Napakasarap niyang pagmasdan habang natutulog kahit malakas ang bagsak ng ulan sa bubong at sa paligid. Napaka-payapa ng kanyang mukha na parang katulad nang siya’y musmos pa lamang.
Hiyang si Liz sa tag-ulan at tag-lamig kaya naman lubos niyang sinasamantala ang pag-papahinga sa ilang mga araw na pansamantalang nanggagalaiti ang mga laganas na maitim na ulap sa panahong na kung tutuusin ay papalapit na ang tag-init at tag-araw.
Ang sarap halikan at amuyin ang kanyang ulo na nakadantay sa akin. Siya’y kaunting gagalaw at bibiling sa tuwing kukulog at kikidlat ngunit hindi niya alintana ang uma-alingawngaw na pagsigaw ng langit. She felt safe and comforted around my arms.
Bago umalan ay nag-uusap lamang kami ng aking anak matapos naming mag-merienda. Nang magsimulang muling umambon ay nakatulog na siya. Buti na lamang at naka-urong ang aming kina-uupuan kaya hindi kami natalsikan ng malakas na buhos ng ulan habang kami ay nag-papahinga sa patio.
Nang tuluyang nang lumakas ang buhos ng ulan at habang yakap ang aking anak, pinanood ko na din lamang ang mga munting butil ng tubig na tila nag-tatalunan sa ibabaw ng swimming pool.
Ngunit kasabay ng pagbuhos ng ulan ay ang pagliyab ng aking puso para kay Liz. Her weight, as she lay on me, adds to my sense of being, for the pressure on my body, the warmth touch on her skin, confirms my existence—”I feel, therefore, I exist.”
Ang mga halaman at bulaklak na nakapalibot sa hardin ay nagkabuhay at tila tuwang tuwang madiligan kahit halos madik-dik ng ulan na wagas ang pagbagsak. Unti-unting na ding umapaw ang tubig sa semento at munting damuhan hanggang sa tuluyang rumagasa ang agos patungo sa pader at papalabas sa kalsada.
Hihigpit ang aking yakap at muli’t muling hahagkan ang kanyang ulo’t noo habang ramdam ng aking puso ang pagsamo’t paghumaling sa natutulog kong anak. Gusto ko sanang sabayan ang malakas na buhos ng ulan nang pag-sigaw na mahal na mahal ko siya.
Sa pagbuhos at sa pagtila ng ulan, mananatili siya sa aking mga halik at yakap at maipaparamdam ko sa kanya kung gaano ko siya kamahal sa anumang oras or kahit sa anong araw.
Bumukas and sliding door at lumpit si Amy at pilit na inaabot sa akin ang Vicks VapoRub.
“Ipahid mo ito,” utos sa akin ni Amy.
“Saan?”
“Sa bandang ilong niya para kontra alimuom.”
Sa isip ko ay datu puti lamang ang aking gamit nang ako’y bata pa.
“Wala nang alimuom,” ang kontra ko naman dahil ito ay sa umpisa lamang ng pag-ulan.
“Kahit na,” ang pilit ni Amy na naging overprotective kay Liz.
Ipinihit niya ang takip upang buksan at dumukot ng kaunti gamit ang daliri. Dahan dahan niyang inilapit ang daliring may vicks sa ilalim ng ilong ni Liz. Gusto ko siyang pigilan pero ayaw ko ding sumakit ang sikmura ni Liz kung sakaling “meron” pa ngang alimuom.
Pagkapahid ni Amy ng vicks ay napakunot ang noo ni Liz na tila na-istorbo sa pag-kaka-idlip. Kaya naman pikit pa din nang pumihit at dumapa sa aking dibdib at ipinahid sa akin ang Vicks na nasa kanyang mukha.
“Lagyan mo yung likod niya,” pilit ni Amy at inabot ng tuluyan ang Vicks sa akin.
I scooped some Vicks with my fingers, reached under the blanket, and applied the Vicks to her lower back. I scooped some more, ran my hands to her mid and upper back, and put more Vicks. As usual, she was not wearing a bra, so my fingers and palm glided smoothly on her back. She crawled up until her face snuggled on my neck before she continued sleeping. I lowered her shirt to cover her, and I hugged her.
At that moment, rain fell more heavily, and the surroundings became hazy as if a sheer white curtain covered the whole, yet spacious, patio. I pulled the blanket and covered her head and face, leaving her mouth exposed so she could breathe easily.
I wish we could lay like that forever.
Of course, that’s not possible, and we could only hope for the best to happen or at least yearn for the most benign things in life. The recent events are significant and life-changing. Such happenings, however, weren’t chaotic but heart-stirring.
*** *** ***
A few nights ago:
Habang papunta pa lamang kami sa office ni Atty Remy, tumawag siya.
“Hello.”
“Hello, sir.”
“Papunta na kami,” paalala ko.
“Since I received the result this morning, I could not reach sir Roland.”
“Kaninang umaga mo pa nakuha yung result sa office ninyo?” I asked to confirm.
“Opo, at tumawag muna ako sa kanila pero hindi sumasagot si sir Roland.”
“Eh, si Patricia?”
“Wala po akong contact number niya.”
“So hindi pa sila papunta sa office ninyo?”
“After ninyo pong mag-request ng meeting tonight, I tried to contact si sir Roland again pero wala pa din reply.”
“Akala ko you talked to Roland’s side.”
“Si Raymond lang po ang naka-usap ko at sabi ko na tawagan niya si Patricia para isama si Yssa at mag-meet tayong lahat sa office namin.”
“Anong update na kay Raymond?”
“Hindi po siya sumasagot sa call at text.”
“So, we are not sure kung papunta sila sa office.”
“Wala pa pong confirmation sa kanila.”
“I guess we don’t need to proceed sa office ninyo tonight.”
“Opo, and maybe tomorrow will be better,” ang pagkasabi niya na walang bakas ng urgency sa mula sa kanya.
Sabi ko na lang, “You’re right, sige atty.”
Biglaan ang pag-set ng meeting dahil sa pagkabigla at kagustuhan ni Liz. Ngunit hindi ko naman siya masisisi kung hindi siya makapaghintay kinabukasan. Kaya halos hating-gabi na ay nasa kalsada pa din kami at pinag-mamaneho kami ni Nap habang tuloy pa din ang pag-ulan.
“Tawag na lang po kayo bukas para ma-set natin ang meeting sa opisina.”
“I’ll call you tomorrow,” ang sabi ko na lamang maski alam kong nais ni Liz na kausapin ang kapatid sa gabing iyon.
“Sige po, I’ll text Atty. Wendy not to come in our office tonight.”
“Good night attorney at salamat,” pahabol ko na lang.
After I hung up the phone, I noticed that Liz had been busy with her phone texting and instant messaging.
“Dad, Yssa said that she’s with ate Trish.”
“Saan daw sila?”
“They’re at the coffee shop.”
It was the weekend, so they were probably out to hang out with friends.
“Did you message Patricia?”
“Not yet.”
It seemed thatRaymond did not call or text Patricia. Otherwise, mag-memessage si Patricia sa akin.
Nang malaman kong nasa cafe sina Yssa at Patricia, na-isip kong huwag ng ipa-alam kay Patricia na kasama akong naghahanap sa kanila.
I did not want to surprise or alarm Patricia because she’d know that the DNA result was out if Liz were to tell her that Liz and I were looking for them very late that night.
“Just tell Yssa that you are coming home from a party and want to meet her,” ang utos ko sa aking anak.
“Okay, dad.”
“Is your mom with them, too?”
“I doubt it, dad,” but Liz still sent a message and told me Yssa’s response.
“No, dad, Yssa is with ate Tricia and some friends.”
“E si Daniella?”
“Probably not; she’s a homebody, too.”
“Tinext mo din ba si Raymond?”
“Yes, dad pero walang sagot.”
“It’s probably not a pressing matter for him,” sabi ko na lang.
“I don’t care, I want to see Yssa,” ang giit naman ni Liz na lubos kong naunawaan.
I already felt the redemption during the first meeting, though still somewhat emotional for those past days leading to that night. Roland may have accepted that she’s not Yssa’s dad, and he, Raymond, Patricia, and Daniella knew already—based on the initial blood test—that their relationship with Yssa is bereft of consanguinity. Kaya siguro, that’s the probable reason they don’t feel the urgency to talk anytime soon.
But I was there to support Liz, and she made up her mind to find her sister as soon as possible.
I guess nobody anticipated the sudden evening thunderstorm that pre-summer season, for so many people were still hanging out in restaurants and cafes. Liz’s supposed after-party might still be going on at that hour.
“Nap, alam mu yung coffee shop?”
“Yes, sir. Dun ko po madalas sinusundo si Liz.”
Sa isip ko, dun din kaya na “accidentally” nakita ng anak ko ang kargada niya.
“Dad, what are we going to do?”
Roland could not be reached that night, which was understandable because of his condition, and he was likely already asleep lalo na kung nag-dialysis siya ulit that weekend.
Kung hindi tumawag si Atty. Wendy nang gabing iyon at kinabukasan na lamang niya ako ininform, malamang kina-umagahan na lang din kami naghahanap kina Yssa. At kung sa umaga, marahil makakadating din si Roland. At tutal, alam ko na din naman ang totoo for the past several days mula noong unang conference sa opisina ni Atty Remy.
Ngunit para kay Liz talaga kung bakit hindi ko na inalintana ang oras at pag-ulan.
Karapatan ni Liz na makita at kausapin ang kanyang kapatid kaya’t hinagilap namin si Yssa. At dahil wala si Roland at Jess, pati na ang mga abogado, hahayaan ko na lamang si Liz na kausapin ang kapatid.
Medyo pansamantalang tumila nang bahagya ang ulan pagdating namin sa cafe. At dahil sa pag-ulan, walang mga tao sa labas at balcony ng coffee shop.
Tutok ang ilaw mula sa poste pero ang salamin ng cafe ay parang balot ng hamog at ulap dahil sa lamig sa loob at pag-ulan sa labas.
“Liz papuntahin mo na lang siya sa sasakyan,” ang mungkahi sa kanya.
Subalit sa pagpreno at pagparada ni Nap, Liz unhooked her seatbelt, opened the door, and dashed to the steps of the cafe. I was anxious but tried to compose myself as I followed her.
For the past few days, while waiting for the DNA result, I imagined and even anticipated Liz’s actions and reaction; so, though I was eager for her to know everything, I wasn’t utterly excited anymore. My role that evening was to be there for her and support her. Well, I guess, to be there for my daughters.
Ang ugong ng mga sasakyan, ang pitik ng ulan sa yero, at malumanay na ihip ng hangin sa mga puno at halaman sa labas ay nasapawan bigla pagbukas ng mahogany door; biglang sumalubong ang nag-sasabayang tinig ng mga taong nag-uumpukan at nag-kwekwentuhan.
May mga ibang tahimik na kumakain; may iba namang tila nasa ibang daigdig habang nakatutok ang mga mata sa telepono; at sa isang sulok naman ay may grupo na malakas na nagtatawanan.
After I entered,Green-Tinted Sixties Mindstarted playing inside the cafe. The song always uplifts my mood whenever I hear it.
All tables were occupied, and the place was a bit crowded. Though the inside was supposed to be dimly lit, one or two regular lights were turned on, so Liz quickly found Yssa and Patricia.
Dahil nauna sa akin si Liz, nakatayo na siya sa harap nina Yssa nang pagpasok ko sa pintuan. Naka-upo sa aking paboritong lamesa’t upuan si Yssa, Patricia at dalawa pa ni lang kasama’t kaibigan.
Nakita naman agad ako ni Patricia at nag-iba ang kanyang reaksyon: siya’y naka-ngiting nakikipag-usap kay Liz at ng makita ako, nagulat siya bigla ngunit wala namang bakas ng pagkabahala sa kanyang mukha. Tila ba kaagad niyang naunawaan kung bakit ako nandoon at kasama ni Liz.
Alam ni Patricia na may dala kaming balita para kay Yssa.
Their two friends seemed to know Liz, and they were talking to her too. Liz, however, could not engage in a conversation with them and was very preoccupied with her thoughts and her sister.
Hinawakan ni Liz ang kamay ni Yssa at hinila upang tumayo. Yssa saw me and said, “Hi, tito.” Patricia, however, kept silent and seemed to be brewing in mixed emotions. She must have imagined Yssa’s reaction upon learning the truth and was about to witness it in a few moments.
She knew well that such revelation would eventually happen. I could only imagine what Patricia was thinking or feeling. I sympathized with her because Yssa, who grew up with her, is not her real sister, after all.
“Oh, ate where are we going?” Tanong ng kapatid kay Liz.
“Let’s go at the back.”
“Is everything okay?”
“I need to tell you something?”
“Tell me what?”
“Not in here.”
“Oh, something bad happened?” Yssa’s face started to show some concern.
“Nothing bad happened.”
“Why do we need to go to the back?”
Just come with me, please,” Liz insisted.
From the main dining or sitting area of the cafe, Liz led Yssa to walk in front of the refrigerated display case, cashier, and to the hallway going to the restrooms. I followed them, and Patricia left the table and followed us.
After we passed the toilets, Liza walked further to the hallway that led to the back. Liz and Yssa reached the end of the hallway and opened the double door. (Right before the double door is an entrance to the kitchen; however, there’s also access to the kitchen behind the counter and the display case).
After the double door is a small courtyard. The left side is the property wall, and on the right side is part of the owner’s residence. Both sides were nicely landscaped, and rose apple trees were planted near the border.
Near the rear wall, the owner also planted sugar apple trees and avocado trees. Clear icicle lights adorn all trees surrounding the courtyard in green wires. The lights were secured and safe from strong winds, and they weren’t twinkling; thus, the lights formed a luminous constellation in the branches and leaves.
There are a couple of jackfruit and soursop trees on the residence’s side, decorated with clear icicle lights blinking slowly. Such animation gave an effect of hundreds of fireflies stalking the night. With the steady and twinkling lights, the courtyard was surely mesmerizing with the shimmering display of enchanting lights.
The residence’s terrace is behind the jackfruit and soursop trees on the residence’s side and near the double door. It has a roof covering, and nobody was there at that time. Liz and Yssa were standing by the terrace’s sofa set, and I stood by near the steps that lead to the terrace. Patricia stood opposite me under a porch light.
The courtyard is not really open to customers. But Liz practically grew up going to the coffee shop, and everyone there knew us, especially Liz. There were several occasions when we had small private parties in the courtyard, including some of Liz’s private parties with her friends. Hence, the staff and the owner don’t mind us being in the courtyard that night.
Since it was still raining, though not heavily, the courtyard was empty while the four of us were there; now and then, some staff would pass by, but we were by ourselves most of the time.
Yssa was calm but clearly confused, and Liz did not know how to start, so she looked at me. I nodded, prompting her to proceed. Liz also looked at Patricia, and she nodded, with her lips closed in a half-smile, allowing Liz to tell Yssa the truth.
Liz couldn’t speak at first, so she hugged Yssa and started to cry. Yssa hugged her back but still waited for her ate to talk. I looked at Patricia; she was also in tears and wiping her face with her fingers.
It seemed an eternity for Yssa as they hugged momentarily, and she started to show emotions. Her lower lip pouted, her face slightly frowned, her eyes became teary, and her voice trembled a little when she managed to utter some words.
“Is my dad okay?” Yssa asked as her voice choked up, and she was about to cry.
As Liz and Yssa embraced each other, Yssa looked at Patricia, and Patricia held her cry and said, “Yes, dad is okay.”
That gave Liz her prompt and followed up with, “but she’s not your real dad,” thus, Liz finally revealed.
“What?” Yssa uttered in a quivering voice.
“My dad is your dad, too.”
“We have the same dad?” And Yssa looked at me. I nodded with my lips pressed in half, yet sincere smile like Patricia’s.
The sudden surprise in Yssa’s face dissipated rather quickly and loosened her embrace from Liz. While they still held hands, Yssa sat on the couch, and Liz sat next to her. I sat on the single-seat sofa on their right side, and Patricia sat on the left armrest of the couch where my daughters sat.
Yssa is also bright. While growing up in a situation where her mom has two families, she knows the story full well, though not the intimate parts, among Roland, Jess, and me. And maybe, once or twice, she may have thought of the possibility that I’m her real father, which was not entirely far-fetched. Kaya naman Yssa quickly absorbed the realization.
It would have been totally different and shocking had she been adopted at natuklasan niya na ampon lamang siya. Pero kung sabagay, ang ganung scenario ay nangyayari din naman.
Since Yssa was sitting closer to Patricia, they looked at each other. Yssa stood up, Patricia approached her, and they hugged each other. Yssa clearly and fully realized that she and Patricia aren’t blood-related. As they both cried, Liz, approached me and hugged me tightly. I could see the relief and satisfaction in my daughter’s teary eyes.
“Ate,” Yssa cried on Patricia’s shoulders.
“Ate mo pa din ako,” na walang pag-aalinlangan tugon ni Patricia.
At that moment, watching them console each other, I felt sad for Yssa, Patricia, Daniella, and Raymond. They’re all nice and close to one another. I thought the lack of filiation would later shatter their kinship with Yssa. But I truly hoped not.
When Yssa and Patricia broke their hug, I let go of Liz, and my daughter approached and hugged Patricia. Yssa and I walked toward each other and hugged. That was not the first time I hugged her because I’d embraced her as she grew up during her birthdays, the usual get-together or gatherings, holidays, and other occasions.
But it felt different from embracing her that night, knowing she is my biological child. I’d loved Yssa as Liz’s half-sister, and now I love and care for her more for being my real daughter.
Feeling all emotional, while the girls were still teary-eyed, I let go of Yssa, and Liz let go of Patricia. Liz and Yssa hugged again, and Patricia and I looked at each other. When she started walking toward me, I approached her and half extended my arms down slightly forward. In that manner, I could easily turn and stand next to her and tap her shoulder and back in a caring way if she did not want to be held.
I felt good when she moved closer, held, and hugged me.
Patricia cried, but quietly, as I held her. Looking down at her face with teary eyes, she appeared vulnerable, and hearing her muffled cries evoked a familiar feeling in me. I hugged her tighter so her body and breasts squeezed more on me. Her breasts are bigger than my daughter’s.
I felt tingling on my neck that shot below and behind my ears.
It was a cold, rainy night, yet I felt warmth in my stomach and groin. Patricia wiped her eyes and rested her cheek on my chest. My left arm held her upper back while my right arm pulled her midback towards me. I placed my right cheek on her head and slightly swung our bodies to comfort her.
I felt Liz’s gaze towards me, but it took me a few seconds to look at her. Liz stared at me calmly as my erection slowly built. Yet, Patricia wouldn’t release me, and she comfortably felt my fingers gently massage her back.
When our stares locked, I could see the same desire in my daughter’s eyes when I was on top of her in bed and watched her in pleasure. Aware of Liz’s seemingly tacit approval and Patricia’s vulnerable state, my cock became fully engorged and stiff.
Most definitely, Patricia felt it.
*** *** ***
Lampas hating-gabi na nang maglakad kami pabalik sa coffee shop mula sa courtyard. Dahil weekend, medyo madami pa ding tao sa loob. Nandun pa din ang dalawang kaibigan nina Yssa at meron mga bagong kasama. As Yssa and Patricia talked to them, tila kakilala din nila ang mga dumating. The cafe is open for another hour pero nag-paalam si Yssa na mauna na at sasasama sa amin.
Umuulan ulit sa labas kaya pina-park ko si Nap sa mismong harap at pinasundo ko si Liz ng payong. Pinayungan ni Nap si Liz at Yssa papunta sa sasakyan. Ngunit mula pa sa courtyard, at habang pasunod kami ni Patricia pabalik sa loob ng coffee shop ay naka-akbay na siya sa aking braso. Hanggang sa palabas, at patungo sa sasakyan, ay naka-akbay pa din siya sa akin. Binitawan niya lamang ako ng pumasok at umupo ako sa front passenger side. Silang tatlo naman ay sa likod umupo at sa gitna si Yssa.
Nap took us all back to the house. Ayaw maghiwalay nang mag-kapatid at nagyayang umuwi at matulog lahat sa bahay. Kasama na din si Patricia at nag-text na din siya sa papa niya na tutuloy sila ni Yssa sa amin. Habang nasa sasakyan, “maagang natutulog si papa and I sent him a text for him to read tomorrow when he wakes up,” ang paliwanag ni Patricia.
“Para hindi siya mag-worry na wala tayo sa bahay,” dagdag naman ni Yssa.
Dahil naka-silent ang phone ko, hindi ko nakita ang missed call mula kay Atty. Wendy. Dahil nga lumabas na ang DNA result, naghihintay siya ng instructions sa akin.
She sent a text message, too, and I replied to her question: “Go ahead, atty,” sabi ko sa text. Tinanong kase niya ako kung i-fifile na niya ang court petition to correct Yssa’s name on her birth certificate. Atty Wendy texted back and asked: “Should I file thepetition for custody of minorchild Maria Luisa Belverde?” “Go, atty,” and text kong muli. Mayroon na kasing DNA result na magagamit si Atty. Wendy bilang ebidensya sa mga petitions na kanyang i-fifile sa family court.
Naisip kong i-texted Jess, “Good pm, komusta.”
I was surprised she answered, “Okay lang. Buti at gising ka pa?”
Nag-isip muna ako saglit kung anong reply ko.
“Kasama namin sina Yssa, uwi dito sa bahay.”
“Akala ko nasa kwarto lang sila.”
“May party kasing pinuntahan si Liz at nag-kitakita sila after,” kunwaring text ko na lang.
Subalit nag-text din naman pala si Yssa at Patricia kay Jess na uuwi sila sa amin.
Inabisuhan ko sina Aida at Amy na pauwi na kami sa bahay kaya’t pagdating namin ay bukas na ang gate at sa covered garage na bumaba kaming lahat.
Around 1:30 am na ayon sa orasan na nakasabit sa living room nang tumuloy sa basement ang tatlo. Sumunod naman ako matapos kong mag-palit ng damit. Nandun na din si Aida at Amy na nag-aayos ng kanilang tutulugan.
Kaso nga lang, at dahil weekend din naman, walang tila gusto matulog muna kaya’t hinayaan ko mag-bonding si Liz at Yssa at para mag-usap at mag-plano kung nais ni Yssa na tumira sa bahay.
“Ate, pagluto mo kami ng snacks,” request ni Liz kay Aida.
“Liz bawal kang mag-puyat,” mariing paalala ni Amy sa kanya.
“After naming kumain matutulog na kami,” ang hiling naman niya.
“Kailangan din niyang kumain,” ang sabi ko din kay Amy at nagka-intindihan naman kami ni Amy sa pag-alaga kay Liz.
“Anong gusto niyong merienda?”
“Ate tosilog please.”
“Merienda ba iyon?”
“Nagutom ako bigla, eh.”
“O sya, anong klase?”
“Chicken.”
“Anong gusto mo?” tanong ko kay Yssa.
“Pork po,” na medyo nahihiya niyang sagot. Nangiti lamang si Liz at Patricia sa kanya.
“Ikaw Pat?” tanong ni Amy.
“Busog pa ako. Tulungan na lang kitang magluto,” sagot ni Patricia.
“San kayo kakain, dito o sa taas?”
“Dito na lang ate,” ang muling request ni Liz.
Biniro ko si Yssa, “Sabi ng mommy nyo na gusto mo din daw ng basement?”
Nag-blush bigla si Yssa at nakangiti ngunit halatang nahihiya. Nagtago sa likod ni Patricia at yumakap sa ate. Natawa kaming lahat dahil nabigla siya kung bakit ko alam na gusto niya din ng basement. Now, she has a choice to actually stay in the apartment-like basement by herself or with her ate Liz. Papalapit na din ang bakasyon at magkakasama ulit silang tatlo nina Deth. The extra bed is for Deth, but they always switch, pero madalas naman na gusto ni Yssa sa top bunk ng double-deck bed.
Patricia let Yssa hug her from behind and swayed gently from side to side as we casually talked to one another.
“Ate, shower muna ako,” ang paalam ni Yssa kay Patricia at Liz.
“After mo, ako,” sabi ni Liz.
Kahit na may mga bathroom sa taas, balak nilang na magstay lang sa basement at salitang maligo. “Malalamigan ka,” muling paalala ni Amy.
“May hot shower naman ate.”
Hindi pa nga pala naligo si Liz matapos ko siyang asawahin bago kami umalis at hanapin sina Yssa.
“Huwag kang magtagal.”
“Yes, ate.”
Pagkarinig ko nun ay sabay na akong umakyat kasama ni Patricia at Amy. Naiwan si Aida para tapusin ang ginagawa at i-ready ang lamesang kakainan sa basement. Halos kumpleto sila ng gamit sa basement maliban lang sa lutuan. May mga gamit at damit din si Yssa sa isa sa mga closets.
Hindi pa alam nina Amy at Aida ang balita subalit normal lamang ang mga kilos namin nina Patricia at hinayaan ko lamang na asikasuhin ni Amy at Aida sina Liz at Yssa.
Pagdating namin samain dining area, “ako na lang ang magluto,” sabi ni Amy kay Patricia.
“Okay, lang?”
“Bisita ka kaya relax ka lang.”
“Uy hindi naman, ate.”
“Kami na lang. Saka mabilis lang naman yung pinapaluto nila.”
“Sige, ikaw ang bahala. Salamat.”
At tumuloy si Amy sa kusina.
“Gusto mong mag-shower?” Tanong ko kay Patricia.
“Wala akong damit na dala.”
“You can wear Liz’s shirt.”
“Ay hindi ko kasya.”
“She has some shirts in different sizes. Go check her room.”
Patricia could fit some of Liz’s clothes since Liz often buys and wears oversized t-shirt inside the house. Besides hindi naman chubby si Patricia at ang katawan niya ay yung type na bagay mag-suot ng two-piece swim suit katulad ni Rebecca. Ngunit noong nasa edad ni Patricia si Rebecca, si Rebecca pa din ang mas sexy.
“Si Liz kasi kapag nasa amin, pwedi niyang isuot ang damit namin nina Daniella at Yssa.”
“I’m sure meron shirt si Liz na medyo mahaba na pambahay,” at hindi ko sinabing ‘malaki’ dahil kaunti lamang ang tangkad ni Patricia kay Liz at ang mga suso naman niya ang maaring magpasikip ng kaunti sa ibang petite na damit ni Liz.
Bigla akong na-excite. Sana hindi niya mahanap ang ilang malaking shirt ni Liz upang makita kong hapit ang kanyang suot.
“Dun ka na din maligo sa room ni Liz,” mungkahi ko din sa kanya.
“Sige maya maya ng kaunti.”
She pulled a chair and sat by the dining table.
“You want some water or juice?”
“Water na lang.”
I opened the fridge, took bottled water, and handed it to her. I pulled a chair and sat at one end of the dining table. From where I sat, Patricia was on my right side.
After she drank half of it, she joked, “Wala bang mas matapang?”
Patricia somehow read my mind because I felt I needed a nightcap after everything that happened that evening.
“Anong gusto mo hard or beer?”
She adjusted her chair at an angle to face me.
“Nag-beer na kami kanina, hard na lang.”
“Pati si Yssa?”
“Half glass lang siya.” Binigyan ko siya ng kaunti.”
I recalled that Yssa had wine when she and Stella spent one weekend sa bahay, so I wasn’t really concerned. Besides, Yssa was with her ate Tricia.
“She had San Mig light?” I asked, nonetheless, hoping that what Yssa had was not something stronger.
“San Mig apple, her favorite?”
“Ah, okay. Ikaw, naka ilang San Mig ka?”
“Red horse,” na medyo may pagka-shy niyang sagot.
Though my sight was trained on her eyes, I kept thinking how nice to feel her chest when we hugged earlier in the courtyard.
“Regular?”
“Stallion lang.”
“Naka-ilan ka?”
“Apat.”
“Bago kayo pumunta sa coffee shop?”
“Dun sa bahay ng kasama namin kanina.”
“Ah, so wala ng tama?”
“Manga 8 pm kami uminom kaya wala na.”
“Well, we could just have one round before we sleep.”
“I needed one, too.”
“I got whisky?”
“Scotch?”
“Jack Daniel’s”
“Oh!”
“Why?”
“Nothing.”
I smiled, hoping she’ll tell my kung bakit siya napa, “oh!”
“Traumatic experience ba?”
“Hindi naman.”
“Sad memory?”
“Hmm, maybe.”
“Or regrets?
“Ah, could be.”
“Regrets then.”
She just smiled, which gave me a reason to look at her lips.
“Just wait here,” I said and stood up.
“San ka punta?”
“To get the drink.”
“I’ll get the glass na lang.”
“Don’t worry. All are at the bar.”
“Edi dun na lang tayo.”
“Pwede din, tara,” and I gestured with my head to follow.
Patricia stood and followed me. The bar is located in another hallway, different from the hallway where Liz’s room and my room are located. It is in the hallway that leads to the patio and swimming pool. The bar is right by the exit, which leads to the patio, and is on the TV room’s opposite side. The inside bar is smaller and has four adjustable height swivel bar stools (the bar by the pool has eight). The barstools are upholstered with black leather and have a low backrest.
Patricia sat on the stool at the end while I went behind the bar to grab whiskey and glasses. There’s a small fridge underneath the liquor shelves in case we need ice and cold water.
I walked around and sat on the barstool with one between us. We both spun our seats to face each other, and I raised my glass in front of her.
“To regrets,” and I clicked her glass.
“To regrets, ang sagot naman niya at sabay kaming nag-sip.
That night, Patricia wore an untucked, collared white long sleeves shirt. The sleeves were rolled up to her mid-forearm, and the two top buttons were undone. She wore dark blue jeans, white socks, and a slip-on sandal with an upper, which she borrowed from the closet by the main door.
Lights were off in the bar area, except for the ceiling lights on top of the barstools. The light shined directly below us.
“Sanay ka pala sa puyatan.”
“Ayus lang. weekends naman.”
“Kung sabagay. Time to unwind.”
“Minsan nga 5am na kami umuuwi.”
“With Yssa?” Suddenly I started to care about Yssa’s going out late at night, which I had not done before.
“Not with her, with my co-workers.”
“Mga young professionals.” I teased her.
“Sometimes with my friends or classmates nung college.”
“Like yung kasama ninyo kanina?”
“Oh, those two are my childhood friends.”
“Dito na nga pala kayo lumaki.”
Patricia, Raymond, and Daniella moved from their province to live with Roland when they were still children. All three of them were already living with Roland when Jessica gave birth to Yssa. Their bond is strong, and they knew Jessica and me very well.
“We all have yet to talk to Yssa,” ang sabi ko.
“There’s too much to take for her.”
“At least mag-kausap na sila ni Liz, so Yssa’s surprise would have softened.”
“Are you going to talk to her?”
“Oo, habang nandito kayo.”
Patricia and I sipped from our glasses as we talked, and later on, I noticed that our drinks were almost empty.
“Anong sasabihin mo sa kanya?”
“A lot, but I really don’t know which one to say first.”
“Let her talk first,” sabi ni Patricia.
“That’s a good suggestion. Or ask her what’s she thinks about everything.”
“True. It’s better to know first what she thinks about these things.”
“Well, other than paternity matters, I will not impose drastic change,” ang guaranteed ko.
“What do you mean?”
“Do things slowly.”
“That’s a good idea.” She then took another sip and placed her empty glass on the bar.
“Let’s not overwhelm her too much.”
“Like everything is normal. Well this is totally different from normal,” bawi naman niya kaagad.
I smiled and replied, “I won’t pretend everything is the same.”
“I understand.”
“You want some more?”
“Okay.”
Instead of pouring her glass with whiskey, I slid the bottle towards her. Patricia took it, and to my surprise, she poured a little more than what I gave her. She offered the bottle to me, but I let her pour the liquor into my glass.
“To Yssa,” I said, and we touched glasses and sipped more whiskey.
“Are you going to make her live here, eventually?”
“It’s up to her. Hayaan ko sila ni Liz na mag-decide.
“I’m sure they would want to be together.” I noticed the sadness in her voice.
I downplayed the situation and said, “ang nagbago lang naman ay na-discover na full-blooded sisters sila.
Kaso, mali ako ng banat dahil ang sagot ni Patricia ay, “nawala naman ang pagka-half-sibling namin kay Yssa.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Okay na din naman. We’ll treat her as our sister pa din.”
First, I glimpsed at her nose and said, “everything will be fine. There is a strong bond between Yssa and you and your siblings.”
“Kapatid pa din ang turing namin kay Yssa.”
“I know hindi na magbabago iyon.”
“Kailan mo kakausapin si tita Jessica?”
“Hindi pa pala niya alam.”
“She doesn’t know both the DNA testing and the result.”
Her answer was cryptic, but I thought of reserving my questions when I spoke to Jess instead of asking Patricia about what she meant.
“Anong sinabi sa inyo ng papa ninyo?”
“He kept saying na ituring pa din namin si Yssa bilang kapatid.”
I looked at her nose again for a second, “I’m sure that won’t be so difficult.” Sabi mo nga kapatid pa din ang turing ninyo sa kanya.
“At hindi magbabago yung love ko sa kanya.”
“I know that will stay the same.”
“Always.”
We paused for a while before I sipped again.
I sigh first, not because of disappointment, but of feeling surreal, “now I have three daughters.”
“Oh, pati si Deth nga pala,” na biglang naalala ni Patricia. Nakasama at naka-bonding na rin niya kasi si Deth noon pa kapag nagbabakasyon siya sa bahay.
“Big news din kay Deth ito.”
“Pero parang hindi yata masyadong close si Deth kay Yssa.”
“They get along pretty well naman, and they treat each other like cousins kase.”
“Now, they sisters, too.” At muling nag-sip si Patricia ngunit wala ng kalungkutan sa kanyang boses. Marahil ay tanggap na niya rin nang lubusan ang katotohanan.
“I hope they will soon treat each other as sisters.”
“Mag-bonding silang tatlo this summer.”
I looked at her lips for three seconds, “nag-plan na ako sa pagdating ni Deth.”
“They always hang out naman pag nandito si Deth,” and we both finished our drink almost at the same time.
“Sama sama ulit kayo pati si Daniella at Raymond.”
“We did that two years ago.” Biglang naalala ni Patricia.
“Gusto mo pa?”
She extended her glass to me, which meant yes. I refilled our glasses with whiskey and touched glasses.
“What’s the toast for?”
“Reunion,” I replied.
“Reunion,” at sabay kaming nag-sip.
Medyo tipsy na ako at I’m sure na may effect na din kay Patricia ang alak maski posibleng sanay siya sa inuman. Also, I know I will be dealing and thinking about a lot of family matters, so I changed the topic.
“Maiba ako.”
“Ano yon?”
“Bakit regrets?”
“Yung sinabi ko kanina?”
“Yeah.”
Since we were not strangers and we already shared emotional moments during the first meeting at the coffee shop, plus the whiskey, Patricia opened up.
“Wala iyon. About my ex lang.”
“We don’t have to talk about him,” which really meanslet’s talk about it.
“It’s okay. Sometimes talking helps.”
It seemed that she was not over about the breakup; otherwise, she would not need help from talking about it.
“How long ago?”
She sipped muna and think, “almost 5 months na.”
I looked at her lips again for four seconds before I asked, “Ilang years kayo?”
“Three years.”
“Oh, that was long.”
“Very long.” At natawa siya.
“Your first boyfriend?”
“Not really.”
“Pang ilan?”
Napangiti siya sa tanong ko.
“Well, since high school may mga MU lang at…”
“Not serious,” I completed her words.
“Parang ganun na nga.”
“So ilan yung serious?”
“Hmm, may semi-serious din,” at natawa kami pareho.
“Ano yung semi-serious?” Curios kong tanong.
“Ewan ko nga kung ano iyon.”
“Try mo sige,” and I posed to listen.”
“Yung semi-serious ay yung crush lang tapos naging kami.”
While she talked,I looked at her lipsfor three seconds,then at her nose.
“Parang MU?”
“Pag MU kase, minsan hindi natuloy maging mag-on.”
Nang medyo paubos na ang inumin ko, I bottomed up and she did the same.
“Teka, refill?”
She nodded and offered her glass, and allowed me to pour some more. We touched our glasses at siya naman ang nag-toast, “MU!”
“MU,” Sabi ko din at while I sip, Istared at her lips. She noticed it and smiled.
“Yung bang parang infatuation tapos niligawan ka?”
“Ganun ng nga.”
“Pero hindi seryoso?”
“Mukhang may sincere naman.”
“Parang nag-take advantage dahil alam niyang may gusto ka?” And my tone was more of asking a question than a declaration to avoid offending her.
“I felt naman na meron din feelings.”
“For sure,” and I hoped she took it as a compliment.
“Pero hindi nagtatagal.”
“Pag nawala na yung infatuation?”
She smiled, indicating admission, and asked, “Ang babaw ko no?
“Hindi naman.”
“You think so?”
I looked ather eyes, her nose, and stared ather lipsagain for four seconds, at sabi ko, “infatuation, though it might be fleeting, is an intense feeling, and it’s wonderful that you made the connection with that person while the mutual feeling was there.”
“Kung sabagay.”
“What’s important was that you enjoyed those moments.”
Napangiti siya at tila naalala at biglang nanumbalik ang kilig na nadama noon.
“Yah, I had fun,” at tuloy lamang ang pag sip namin sa aming mga baso habang nag-uusap
“Fun?” Ma-intriga kong tanong.
“Well, yung typical na highschool at college puppy love.”
Feeling that she’ll open up more, I asked, “Fun, how?”
“Yung lalabas, manonood ng sine.”
“Holding hands,” dadag ko pa.
“Saka kaunting…ano.”
“Ano?”
“Kiss?” at nag-blush siya bigla.
“Kaunti lang?” patanong kong biro atmuli kong minasdan ang kanyang mga labi.
“Napapadami kung minsan,” at muli siyang tumawa ngunit medyo pigil. Halatang nahiya siya sa sinabi niya.
“That’s totally fine. We all been there.” Ang sabi ko so she won’t feel awkward.
“Mukhang madami ka din experience,” biglang baling sa akin.
She might have meant girlfriend instead of the word “experience,” pero ayaw kong mag-speculate dahil maaring iba talaga ang ibig-sabihin between sa pagkakaroon ng girlfriends at pagkakaroon ng mga experience.
“Kita mo naman tatlo ang daughters ko,” pabirong sabi ko na lang.
“Kung sabagay, pero any regrets?”
Knowing that she was pertaining to Jessica and Rebecca, “None, to regret my exes is to regret my daughters. Kaya walang regrets.”
“That’s makes sense,” at nag-bottom up muling ang baso niya, at nilagok ko na din ang natitirang alak sa baso ko upang sabayan siya.
Si Patricia na mismo ang nagtagay sa aming mga baso habang nagsasalita ako, “Though I regret some of my actions, masaya ako sa mga anak ko,”
“To your daughters,” and toast naman niya at nag-dikit muli ang aming mga baso.
“To my daughters,” ang sabi ko din at while I sipped,minasdan kong ang kanyang mga labi atmanga tatlong segundo sakanyang leeg.
Napansin niya ang aking tingin atnapahawak ang kanyang daliri sa kanyang kwintas. Subalit tila ayos lang sa kanya ng pina-ikot at nilaro-laro ng kaunti ng kanyang daliri ang kwintas
“Meron ka ding mga semi-serious?”
“Yung mga sumunod kay Rebecca, kasi nga I did not see myself committing with any of them.
“Eh yung before kayo ni tita Jess?”
“Siya ang unang girlfriend ko.”
“Ay oo nga pala.”
“Eh yung mga serious relationship mu naman?” at muli kongtinanaw ang kanyang labi at leeg.
Tuloy lamang na nakaharap siya sa akin, “bale dalawa lang.”
“Yung last yung pangalawa?”
“Yun na din yung huli,” at napatawa siya.”
I had heard her laughs before. Kapag magkakasama sila nina Liz maski noon pa, nakakahawa ang tawa ni Tricia. Matatawa ka din sa tawa niya pero hindi naman siya mismo ang tinatawanan.But that night, I found her laughter very endearing. Yung bang tawa na sweet pero nakakahawa pa din.
Nangiti lamang ako at, “ah, you’re still young naman.”
“Hmm, I know naman.”
“Saka noong nag-break kayo nung nauna, diba akalu mu parang last na din iyon pero nagkaboyfriend ka naman ulit.”
Natahimik muna siya ng saglit at, “Not quite?”
“Rebound lang ba yung sumunod?”
“Not exactly.”
A little puzzled, “So, anong nangyari?”
Muli siyang natahimik, pero ang postura ko ay nag-hihintay ng sagot.
“Nagkagusto ako sa pangalawa…”
“Habang kayo pa nung una?” Ang aking nasabi nang hindi niya ma-ituloy ang sasabihin.
“Yeah, habang kami pa nung una,” at napalayo ang kanyang tingin.
At nang muling humarap sa akin, Istared at the base of her neck and scanned her left and right shoulders. Napahinga siya ng malalim nang muli kong masdan ang kanyang labi ng ilang segundo.
“Don’t worry, and I’m not here to judge.”
“I hope not,” at napangiti naman siya.
“It’s better, to be honest about your feelings and not to drag a relationship na wala ng future.”
“Thank you for understanding,” at sinabayan naman niya akong mag-bottom up.
Hindi na ako nagtanong kung gusto pa niya at ng hawakan ko ang bote ng whiskey, inilapit niya ng kusa ang kanyang baso sa akin.
“Walang judgmental,” ang aking naman toast.
“Walang judgmental,” ang sabi din niya at muli naming idinikit ang aming mga baso at uminom ulit ng kaunti.
“You have an idea about my life, so don’t worry hindi kita huhusgahan,” paalala ko sa kanya.
“I may learn something from you.”
“I doubt it,” kaagad kong sinabi at natawa siya.
Unti unti akong tuluyang natutuwa sa kanyang mga tawa.
“I learned from my experience naman.”
“And then you move forward.”
“There’s no other choice.”
“Exactly,” at mula sa kanyang mga mata, angaking tingin ay muli sa kanyang lower neck at mga balikat.
“It’s mutual decision din naman.”
“May choice ba siya?” Na hindi naman accusative ang aking tono.
“Sabagay.”
“Nadanasan ko din na mutual ang break-up.”
“With tita Jessica?”
“It was not mutual, but I accepted and moved on for the kids.”
“With tita Rebecca?”
“Yes.”
“How was it?”
“Medyo regrettable pa din maski mutual ang decision namin.”
“Who initiated it?”
“She did.”
“Third party?”
“Wala naman.”
“You two fell out of love?”
My eyes droppedfrom her eyes to her neck, and then I stared for a few seconds on thetwo inches below her suprasternal notchsince her top two buttons were undone.
“She said she loves me.”
“You loved her?”
“I care about her a lot,” I said, dodging her question.
But Patricia did not take my answer, “So you don’t love her.”
Then I admitted, “I love her, but I’m not in love with her.”
“I exactly understand.”
“I had a very strong physical attraction to her at first.”
“That’s the definition of infatuation.”
“For grade school and high school, maybe.”
“So meron sexual attraction?” Patricia boldly asked.
I answered unabashedly, too. “It was lust with much affection.”
“I had that, too.
I stared at her lips,”dun sa last na serious boyfriend mo?” Thenmy gaze went to her shoulders and again to where her two buttons opened.
“Hindi, dun sa una.”
“So yung una mong serious na boyfriend ay parang pala with my Rebecca.”
“Bakit may kapalit kaagad din siya,” she asked pertaining to Becca.
“Oh, wala naman. I guess it’s not kapareho ng sa ex mo.”
“Yung sa akin kase, may third party talaga.”
“So, yan yung similar naman with Jessica.”
“Si papa ang third party,” mahina ngunit pabiro niyang sinabi.
I just smiled and refilled our glasses again.
Siya naman ang nag-toast, “Sa mga third-party.”
“Oh, ba’t sila?” Referring to the toast.
“Ewan, lasing na ako,” at natawa kami ulit.
At that point, I felt infatuated with Tricia’s laughter.
“We don’t have to finish this last shot kung lasing ka na.”
“Biro lang. Tipsy lang pero not drunk.”
“We’re good at pacing our drinks.”
“Chill lang naman.”
“Lakas pa din ng ulan,” sabi ko habang napatingin kami pareho sa labas, through the glass of the closed sliding doors.
“It’s a cliche, but I must say na ganyan masarap pag may syota.”
“Pag umuulan at malamig, no?”
She said, “Yeah,” with yearning in her voice.
Again, from her eyes,my sight dropped to her neck, shoulders, and on her opened buttons.
“Kaya sakto itong whiskey.”
She rolled down her eyes and said, “para pampainit,” habang ang mga mata niya ay nakatingin sa inumin at sabay sip sa kanyang baso.
Itinaas ko ang aking baso at aking sinabi, “pampainit,” at inom din ng kaunting alak.
Inabot niya ang bote maski meron pang laman ng kaunti ang aming mga baso at nagbuhos muli ng alak.
She raised her glass, and made a toast, “para sa walang kayakap.”
“Sa walang kayakap,” sabi ko din at sabay kaming uminom.
She mused for a bit and said, “Ang hirap ng break ups.”
“Kung simple lang ang break ups edi sana walang na-composed ng mga hits na breakup songs.”
“Sabagay. Looking at the situation in a positive light.”
“Well, that’s the better alternative.”
“Bakit nga ba may break up pa,” she asked rhetorically.
I just said something relatable, “Minsan alam ng bawat isa na tapos na talaga pero pinapatagal pa.”
“That’s what makes break up even worse,” Patricia added.
“DOA ba yung last relationship mo?”
“DOA?”
“Dead on Arrival.”
“You meant hopeless?
“Yeah! Kinda from that start doomed na.”
“At first it was okay.”
“Lots of passion,” I insinuated.
“Sobra,” and we both chuckled.
Habang tumatawa pa si Patricia,minasdan ko ang kanyang mukha, mga tenga, at labi. She appeared conscious but not uncomfortable and took my stare as a compliment.
“I’m not going to ask you what happened.”
“Thanks, it’s kinda exhausting.”
“I know, trust me. I’ve been there.”
“Except for tita Jess and tita Rebecca, you don’t talk to your exes anymore?
Nag-isip muna ako.
“There are two I still talk to, but I don’t consider them friends.”
“Pero nagkikita pa din kayo?”
“Not planned. Minsan nakakasalubong kung saan saan, like sa mall sa bank, at nakikita ko pati yung iba kong ex.”
“So walang naging FWB?”
Pakiramdam ko na medyo lowered na ang guard niya kaya niya natanong ang FWB. Kaya namannapatingin muli ako sa kanyang mga labing medyo mahabang segundo.
“Wala pero I had a sugar baby, once,” ang bigla kong kumpisal sa kanya.
“Ah!” na medyo exaggerated ang reaksyon niya dahil alam naman niya na nangyayari naman talaga ang ganung set-up.
“Matagal na yun. Grade six pa lang yata si Liz noong nagstart.”
“Gaano kabata?”
“She’s in college na.”
“So paano iyon?”
“Well, she gave me what I wanted, and I gave her what she wanted.”
“Walang commitment.”
“Exactly, I come and go.”
Nangiti siya bago muling uminom sa baso. Kung tama ang hinala ko, may pagka-green minded din siya at natawa siya sa sinabi kong “come.” Sakto,aking naman minasdan ang kanyang leeg and balikat.
“Para pala siyang ano…”
“Escort,” tinapos ko ang sasabihin niya.
“Was it exclusive?”
“I thought so. I got her an apartment at dun ako pumupunta.”
“So alam mo ikaw lang talaga.”
“Kung meron man, I really didn’t care.”
“Why?”
“I did not want to be attached. Wala talagang commitment.”
“Sabagay, sugar baby nga lang siya.”
“But we had a goodsugarrelationship.”
“I guess dahil walang promises at expectations.”
“Ganun nga, kaya walang frustrations.”
“Wow, yan ang kaibahan sa real relationship.”
“What’s real, anyway?” Tanong ko naman.
Pagkasabi niya ng, “kung sabagay,” sinabayan ko siyang muling ubusin ang alak sa baso.
“Buti hindi mo siya nabuntis?” Ang deretso at casual na tanong niya sa akin.
“I was careful. I had her on birth control pills.”
“Why it ended?”
“Our relationship was already defined as purely mutual benefits. When she admitted starting to have feelings, I had to stop the relationship.”
I stared at Patricia withmy eyes moving in a triangle, starting on her eyes, shoulders, upper chests, and back to her neck.
“Hindi ka nag-kafeelings sa kanya?”
“I had feelings enough to care, and I respected her a lot naman.”
“So, it was not purely out of lust?”
“It’s always great that lust is coupled with some affections in bed,” I admitted.
Patricia held her smile. I poured what remained in the bottle, and before we took a sip, she raised her glass and said, “to lust with affection.”
“Amen,” sabi ko naman before we drank
After she swallowed, she said, “I guess it’s for the best.”
“The relationship had served its purpose. We both benefited.”
“How did you end it.”
“We had a long talk, and she understood naman from the start.”
“So, you took back the apartment?”
“I let her stay as long as she wanted, and I gave her a generous “severance package.”
Natawa muli si Patricia sa “severance package,” at muli ko dinminasdan ang kanyang mukha.
“Saka she young. It’s like having sex with your own daughter,” ang comment ni Patricia.
I did not say anything because I knew na mauutal ako sa excitement. I sipped my drink and slowly took a deep breath, not because I was feeling guilty—I never was; then, I suddenly became more aroused.
“Bat’ yung ibang tatay, binubuntis ang anak,” biglang dugtong pa niya.”
I could not speak, so I sipped my drink again. I know that Patricia knew nothing about Liz and me and knew that she was simply talking in a general sense. However, my deviant mind wondered and even imagined that Patricia was getting pumped by her father’s younger and virile version, like what he did to Jessica in front of me.
Patricia never commented on my momentary silence. After I controlled my arousal and composed myself, I asked something about her ex, “Paano ka nag-move on sa last mo?
“First step was to get him out of my life.”
“I see.”
“I know that’s harsh.”
“Hey, as I said, I’m not here to judge you,”staring at the skin uncovered by her two open buttons, she did not re-adjust her position in front of me.
“I removed him from my phone and blocked him and all friends on his side.”
“You have to do what you have to do. You need to take care of yourself first.”
“True. I did everything to make me happy.”
“Like what?”
“I went to a parlor and spa. I shopped and took a vacation from work.”
“You had a fling?” I asked boldly and held my breath for her reaction.
Quicky, she responded, “I thought about it, pero after na lang.”
“So, meron?”
“No, wala.”
“I see,” was my nervous comment.”
“Had there been one, the sex would have definitely made me feel good.”
I was amazed by what she said.
“Just pure raw sex right after a break-up.”
“Never had it, so that’s another regret,” and we laughed.
I have known her for a long time, and it was surreal talking to her about these subjects. Yet again, her laugh and smile became more endearing, soI looked at her face as I drank. But I could not resist notlooking at her lovely neck. She just smiled and took another sip.
To fill our pause, I said, “of course, some couples would try to solve their problems.”
“Oo, minsan. Kase sayang naman talaga.”
“Sayang ba yung last mo?” Then, I became more daring,stared at her two opened buttons, and looked at her upper chestfor four to five seconds.
“Halos lahat naman ng naiwang relasyon ay sayang.”
“Maski bitter ang ending?”
“That’s the consequence of a relationship that has gone bad, but most naman, if not at all, started with mutual feelings and attractions.”
“And one could hope that relationship will stay good after a good start.”
“True, we could only hope.”
“And if it didn’t work out, we moved on.”
“At least after one relationship and another, we’re not clueless anymore.”
“That doesn’t mean that we’ve learned, though.”
“That’s the real tragedy,” and she shrugged her shoulders and sighed.
I refilled our glasses, and she expected another toast, so she also raised her glass.
“To tragedy.”
Instead of saying the same, Patricia said, “and to possibilities.”
When she said “possibilities,” wheels turned in my head, wondering if there was some real-time implication at that moment. Though unsure, I felt bolder, and as I sipped, I looked at her lips. Then slowly,my eyes scanned her chin, neck, and shoulder, and eventually, my sight felldirectlyto her covered breasts.
Within a fraction of a second, my heart beat faster in anticipation of her disapproval. However, she did not fold her shoulders forward or spin her seat to shift her position, so I felt instant relief.
Instead, and to my delight, Patricialooked at me and bit her lower lip. Feeling great from the alcohol and her reaction, I raised my glass and repeated what she said, “to possibilities,” and touched her glass with mine.
We drank the last whiskey from the bottle and asked, “how are you?
“I’m fine.”
“Hindi ba bitin?”
“I feel the buzz pero sakto lang.”
“So, you’re feeling tipsy na?”
“Yeah, but in a good way and not dizzy.”
“You want more?”
I could not ascertain what’s her smile meant. But if I were to guess, she was probably saying in her head, “aba, aba…may balak?”
To my surprise, Patricia seemed to sense my incipient motive, and she teased me.
“Sabi ni Tita Becca, nilasing mo daw siya noon?” at sabay ngiti sa akin.
I forgot that girls unabashedly talk among themselves about secret matters such as relationships and sensuality.
Pero kahit nagulat ako sa pabirong tanong niya, ang sagot ko agad, “Yeah, kaya ayun, nabuo si Deth.”
She shook her head as she laughed, and in the end, I was glad that she did not protest my offer for another drink, and she even suggested, “Okay sige, pero maybe wine na lang.”
“Okay.” And I walked behind the bar to open a bottle of merlot.
“Restroom lang ako,” paalam naman niya.
Habang siya’y papalayo,I looked at her from head to her feet.Halos off na lahat ng mga ilaw at mga bar lights na lang ang nakabukas. Tahimik na din at wala ng mga pagkilos mula kina Amy at Aida. Napakain na nila sina Liz at Yzza at nakapag-ligpit na rin sa kusina. Tulog na din sila dahil hindi naman sadyang nagpupuyat si Amy at Aida dahil maaga silang nag-preprepare sa umaga.
Tahimik na din sa basement at malamang tulog na si Liz at Yzza. Usually, mahaba ang kanilang kwentuhan kapag mag-kasama ngunit hindi din sila madalas nagpupuyat. Naka-ugalian na din kasi ni Liz na magising ng maaga kaya, more often, she doesn’t stay very late at night.
Before Tricia returned, I sat and waited for her on the barstool. Habang papalapit si Patricia, I looked at her again,scanning her face and down to her feet.When she was closer, Ilooked at her chestand could see the trace of her beige bra through her white shirt.
She picked up the glass of merlot and took a sip.
Though the sky fell silent for a while earlier, the sound of the sudden outpouring of the rain drowned the clinking sound of our glasses.
“Lumakas ulit ang ulan.”
“Tara, labas tayo,” yaya niya sa akin.
I grabbed the bottle of wine, took our wine glasses, and led her to the patio. Hindi na kami umupo sa bar at tumuloy kami sa mga couch.
I have a complete set of sofas with a coffee table. The set was situated closer to the sliding door so the furniture would not get wet, even if it were raining hard. Besides, the patio was very spacious, and I had a full-size grill and a cooking area with a sink on one end of the patio.
We sat on the main couch and I was about two feet from her. Naka side-view kami pareho as we faced each other at ang isang tuhod namin ay nakatiklop at sa ibabaw ng sofa. Kaya naman medyo malapit din ang aming mga tuhod sa bawat isa.
Habang nang kami’y unang naupo at nag-adjust sa couch, Ilooked at her side and saw the contour of her breast. Halatang hindi maliit at hindi din naman sobrang laki—sakto lamang at perfect sa hugis ng kanyang katawan.
Minsan sa work, habang nakatalikod ang isang maganda at sexy na client, tinitignan ko ang kanyang pwet at likod. Wala namang salamin sa kanyang harap pero napalingon siya at tinignan ako. Buti na lamang ay nakangiti siya. Kaya karamihan sa mga babae ay may kamalayan na ang isang lalaki ay tumingin sa kanila.
Alam ng mga babae when guys check them out. Maski nakatalikod ay ma-sesense nila na tinitignan sila. Kaya lalo nilang mapapansin kung kaharap ang babae. Kapag nag-uusap, madaling makita kung saan nakatutok ang mga mata. Ang biglaang paglipat ng tingin ay mahahalata kaagad ng kausap. Kayaalam ng babae kung saan naglalakbay ang mga malagkit o kadalasan naman ay malaswang tingin ng isang lalake.
To be fair, maraming mga babae na tumitingin din sa mga lalaki: sa buhok, sa balika’t braso, sa pwet at sa kargada. At kahit na karamihan sa mga babae ay ayaw ma-objectify sexually, pero siguradong meron din na nalilibugan kapag tinititigan ang kanilang katawan, lalo na ang kanilang mga suso.
Tinigasan na ako ng todo habang nasa couch kami.
Binalik ko ang aming usapan tungkol sa ex niya, “So, sabi mo three years din kayo?”
“On and off din kami.”
“So hindi pala steady.”
“Nung two years na kami, medyo madalas ang tampuhan kase.”
“Nag co-cool off muna kayo?”
“Mga two weeks or one month pero not longer than that.”
“Sino ang unang nakikipag-bati?”
“Pareho, pero kadalasan siya.”
“Hindi ka din pala niya matiis.”
“Mahilig kase,” sabay tawa siya.
We both knew what she meant pero nagtanong ako ng pabiro, “mahilig saan?”
She just smiled and drank more wine. Itinaas na din niya ang isang tuhod sa couch and pulled her feet towards her butt. She sat up straight kaya from her lumbar area, nakaliyad ang kanyang likod ng kaunti. At dahil sa kanyan postura, nakadisplay sa aking harap ang hugis at tambok ng kanyang dibdib.
“Pero kahit paano, walang third-party at naging toxic lang talaga kami.”
Pinili ko ang aking sasabihin kaya instead of using the term ‘nabuntis,’ tinanong ko siya, “buti hindi kayo nagka-anak?”
Kaso ang sagot naman niya ay, “muntik na akong mabuntis.”
“Hindi kayo nag-pills.”
“Later nag-injection na ako.”
“Injection? That’s good for about how long?”
“Every twelve weeks nag-papashot ako noon.”
“So, condom lang sa una?”
“At first we used condoms, pero we both don’t like it.”
“I know exactly. Ayaw ko din ng condom.”
“Kaya mo din pinag-pills yung sugar baby mo?”
“Una ayaw niyang mag-pills pero nakumbinsi ko siya.”
“Nung hindi pa siya nag-pills, nag-condom kayo?”
“Sa una lang din pero tinatanggal ko hanggang sa I stopped using condoms.”
“So hit or miss kayo?”
“Not hit or miss. It’s risky, so I had to withdraw,” na may bakas nang frustration pa din sa boses ko.
“Oh, that’s awful,” and her comment indicated that she understood me.
“Ayaw din ng ex mo?”
“He hated condoms.”
“Unnatural ang feelings kase,” ang inamin ko kaagad.
“Kaya ayun, nag-birth control din ako.”
“For us guys, we hated wearing rubber kase it lessens the sensation.”
“And for us girls, we like the skin-to-skin sensation,” napahinga siya ng malalim matapos sambitin ang ito.
Gradually, lust and alcohol had taken over.
“Also, I could not feel her wetness kapag naka-condom.”
“I’m sure she tight,” her casual comment, likely referring to my ex-sugar baby.
I was tempted to ask her the same, but I just said, “she’s wet when very aroused pero hind masarap kapag with condom.”
“Parang kulang, no?”
“Yung bang kahit ‘natapos’ na ay bitin pa din,” ang magiit kong nasabi.
“Not fully satisfied, talaga.”
“Never was with a condom.”
Our conversation seemed to be a general conversation between two adult persons about sexuality. I thought I was the only one getting turned on until she asked and, I was surprised, “San ka nag-rerelease?”
Kahit nabigla ako, automatic naman ang aking sagot dahil ganun talaga ang ginagawa ko, “Ah, mostly on her pubic area and on her belly.”
“My ex did that, too,” ang mahina subalit malinaw niyang sinabi.
Agad naman tumakbo ang aking imahinasyon na nakahiga at nakabukaka si Patricia habang hinugot ng lalake ang kanyang burat at tinamuran ang pusod at tiyan ni Patricia.
Hoping that Patricia would admit something similar to what I’ve done to my ex, I followed up with my answer and added, “minsan on her chest and face.”
She just giggled and drank more wine, and her reaction could mean her ex did cum on her chest and face, too.
Kaya naman na-imagine ko si Patricia na nakahiga at hubad na nakapikit habang pumupulandit ang tamod sa kanyang baba, pisngi, bibig, ilong, at noo, lalo na sa kanyang mga labi at dila.
“But the pleasure isn’t full kapag nag-withdraw,” ang sabi na lang niya at napangiti.
Lumagok muna akong na alak at napa-isip. Prolonged silence could mean an awkward pause, so I had to say something. Sa isip ko ay bahala na if ever she would ask to excuse herself, leave, and go to bed and sleep.
“The pleasure surely decreased upon withdrawal, so eventually, I started cumming in her mouth.”
To my surprise, she knew exactly why I had to do that, “of course, to regain the pressure and intense sensation.”
But I wanted to know if her ex had done the same.
“So, you let your ex…” hindi ko itinuloy ngunit alam na niya ang aking buong tanong.
She rolled her eyes down to the floor, na kunwaring may pagka-demure, and nodded.
To prevent another pause, I quickly added, “my ex-sugar baby would swallow…,” then I asked Patricia, “have you?”
Her closed lips formed a smile, and she looked away from me. A moment of pause, but she just nodded again.
At that moment, I thought I had said and asked enough about sex and decided to stop talking about the topic. But the alcohol, the mood, and the fact that we’re not really strangers to each other seemed to make her comfortable with our conversation.
“Nung nasa pills na siya, mas okay na?” was her question just to fill our conversation since she knew the answer, too.
“Oh, it was fantastic,” ang excited ko namang sinabi.
“Very satisfying,” she said to agree.
“Ganun din ang ex mo?”
“Yeah, fulfilling . . . hindi kami parehong bitin.”
“Do you feel it?”
“Feel what?”
“When he comes.”
She looked away again before, affirming, “Hmm, Yeah.”
“How does it feel?”
“Oh, it felt like a warm fluid shooting and filling inside me.”
“And you like that?” I asked, but in my mind, I thought, ‘of course she does.’
“Yeah, the warmth created more heat inside me, so after I felt the gushes, I wanted him to finish inside me.”
After she said that, my eyes moved from her eyesto her chest and below her waistline. Knowing that I was ogling her crotch, she dropped her foot on the floor, thus opening her thighs.
“My ex said she felt the simultaneous throbbing and successive spurts.”
Syempre, ano pa nga ba naman ang nag-throthrob habang nilalalabasan kung hindi ang burat. Tiyak na alam din ni Patricia kung ano ang nararamdaman ng ex ko.
“Ugh, I missed that feeling,” were her instant words.
“It seemed you remember that feeling.”
“Cumming inside me is the most intimate part of lovemaking.”
“At yung making out, before, during, and after.“
“Before, during, and after what?” She wondered because she seemed her mind was transfixed on something so memorable.
“Climax.”
“Oh yes, that’s the best part. Kissing before, during, and after.”
“It’s sexy and sensual.”
She again agreed and said, “Oh, totally.”
“Lalo na walang worry at walang risk na mabuntis.”
“Actually, it’s not 100% guaranteed to prevent pregnancy.”
I remember what she said was true, “oh, my ex knew it, too. But at least, better than nothing.”
“That small risk added to the pleasure,” which is good to know from her at saka totoo naman talaga lalong masarap kung alam ko na pweding mabuntis.
“Yah, posible pa din mabuntis kase.”
“Kahit na naka birth control, the idea that I was taking millions of sperm is so hot.”
“Sperms could still find your egg, fertilize it and get you pregnant,” and I emphasized “find” and “fertilize.”
“At kahit na relatively safe, I still love the idea and the feeling that I’m being bred.”
“Yung nilalabasan siya sa loob mo?”
She took a deep breath, which was a sign of longing. She sipped more wine and smiled at me.
“I’m sure guys like cumming inside.”
I nodded and said, “it’s like owning her.”
Patricia appeared to be less inhibited because of the whiskey and wine, and she could not resist sharing her thoughts and experience.
“True. I also feel that he’s claiming me when he plants his seeds inside me.”
I scanned her face again—her hair, eyes, ears, and lips.Her reaction was again a smile but sweeter.
She raised her glass when I raised mine. Our hands were in the air for a few seconds, waiting for me to make a toast.
“To no condoms.”
“No condoms,” she said, too.
Pagkatapos naming inumin ang natitirang wine ay inabot ko ang aking kamay upang kunin ang kanyang baso at inilagay ko sa coffee table. Ubos na ang alak at tila magaan ang aming pakiramdam. Sa puntong iyon ay hindi ko pa din lubusang matantsa ang nasa isip ni Patricia na kung ano ang kanyang nais.
Gusto ko siyang lapitan at damhin muli ang kanyang yakap at akbay katulad nang nasa coffee shop kami. Maybe I wanted to feel her embrace again just to feel good.
I thought and hoped we could have a goodnight hug before we sleep, so I asked her, “oh, inaantok ka na yata?”
“I’m fine.” Na tila ayos lang siya dahil simula ng magkwentuhan kami ay ni minsan ay hindi siya nag-hikab.
Still hoping I could get a goodnight hug sooner and feel her bosom, niyaya ko na siyang pumasok sa loob para matulog na siya at mayaakap ko din bago kami maghiwalay.
“Tara, baka gusto mo nang magpahinga.”
“Ayos lang ako.”
I tried again to have her go inside.
“Aren’t you going to take a shower?”
“Maybe, shortly.”
Subalit tila marunong makisama ang kalikasan.
Bahagyang umuulan pa din nang biglang umihip ang hangin at tila merong munting ipo-ipo na umaligid sa amin kinauupuan. Saglit na nadaplisan ng hangin ang aming katawan at ang kanyang buhok ay bahagyang nahihipan ng hangin.
Suddenly, Patricia folded her arms across her chest, and while she may not have felt really cold, she exaggerated her shiver and smiled, “Ooh, ang ginaw.”
Nasa right side ako ng sofa and my left arm and elbow were on the top of the backrest. I extended my left forearm and slid my left hand on top of the backrest towards her. My move was a subtle invitation for her to move closer. If she wouldn’t move closer to me, I could fold my arms across my chest and pretend to be cold, too. That will save me from awkwardness. So, I had hoped for a similar response from her as she when she embraced me at the cafe’s courtyard.
My plan worked twice at kumagat si Patricia.
Umangat siya sa kanyang kina-uupuan and lumapit sa akin. Inilipat ko ang isang cushion na sandalan ng sofa sa right arm rest upang maging unan. I spread my legs, with my right foot dropped on the side, and to the floor.
Pumihit, tumalikod, umupo si Patricia sa pagitan ng aking mga hita at sumandal sa aking dibdib. She extended her legs on the sofa and the top of her head touched my chin.
Gumapang ang aking kaliwang kamay sa ilalim ng kanyang braso hanggang mahawakan ko ang tiyan niya. Hinawakan niya ang aking kaliwang braso at nanatili kaming tahimik sa posisyon na iyon ng ilang minuto.
I lightly rubbed my chin on her head. When I flexed my neck forward and my lips touched her head, Patricia shifted to my right, turned her body to the left to face me, and lifted her face.
Bahagya kong kinaskas ang baba ko sa ulo niya. Nang yumuko ako at dumampi ang aking labi sa kanyang ulo, pumihit pa siya pakaliwa upang harapin ako at idinampi ang pisngi sa akin.
At sa pagpihit niya, ang kanyang mga labi ay may isang pulgada lamang ang layo mula sa aking bibig. I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled and my warm breath blew on her face.
Patricia seemed relaxed and comfortable leaning toward me, and her breaths were deep but calm.
Slowly I moved my head forward and kissed her left cheek, and before I planted another kiss, she turned her body further, looked up, and kissed my lips.
Napa, “hmmm,” kaming pareho habang dikit ang aming bibig at bahagyang nakapisil ang aming mga labi. Sabay, ngunit marahan, naming sinumulan ang salitang pag-pisil at paglaplap ng aming mga bibig. Pansamantalang pigil ang aming pagkasabik at ninamnam namin ang halik hanggang sa mamasa ng laway ang aming mga labi.
Unti-unting humihigpit ang pisil ng aming mga labi hanggang nagtagpo at marahang naglaro pati ang aming mga dila. Dahan dahan na din namuo ang pagkagigil ko sa kanya at bahagyang kong kinagat-kagat ang kanyang labi.
“Uhmm,” “Oohh,” at “Hhmm,” ang mga salitan na mahinang ungol naming dalawa.
Ang aking kaliwang kamay na nasa kanyang tiyan ay umusad paitaas hanggang aking masakmal ang kaliwang suso ni Patricia. Bahagya ngunit tuloy-tuloy ang paglamas ko sa kanyang suso habang tuloy ang aming halikan at lapangan.
“Ahhh,” “Hmm,” “Ahhh…” ang ungol ni Patricia sa aking halik at sakmal sa kanyang malusog na dibdib.
Halos sabay naman ang pag-galaw ng aking mga kamay nang ang aking kaliwang palad ay umangat mula sa kanyang dibdib papunta sa kanyang leeg. Pagkatapos ay hinawakan ko ang kanyang baba sa aking kaliwang kamay habang patuloy kaming naghahalikan
Ang aking kanang kamay naman ay pumaloob sa ilalim ng kanyang damit. Ohh! Ang init ng kanyang tiyan habang aking hinimas-himas ang paligid ng kanyang pusod.
At habang hawak ko ang kanyang baba ay nakapirmi naman ang mga labi ni Patricia sa aking bibig. Ang aking dila ay tuloy pa din ang pag-laro at pag-tikim sa kanyang labi. Sandyang napakalinamnam ng lasa ng pinaghalong laway, whiskey, at wine sa kanyang bibig.
Dahan dahan umusad ang aking kanang palad patungo sa dibdib at kaliwang suso niya. Marahan naman na gumapang at pumailalim ang aking mga daliri sa kanyang bra at una kong pinuntirya ang kanyang utong.
Nakatayo at naninigas ito.
I flicked her nipple side-to-side with my right index finger as my left hand held her chin and kissed and nibbled her lips. “uhhmm,” “uhhmm,” “oohh,” “oohh,” were her soft moans as I made out and fondled Roland’s eldest daughter.
My eyes were closed as we kissed when I felt her arms reach down, and then I felt her lower back and hips lift a bit.
At ng lumipat ang aking bibig sa kanyang pisngi at leeg ay nakita kong bukas ang kanyang zipper at nakababa na ang kanyang jeans.
Sa pagitang ng kanyang zipper ay ang pulang laced panty niya na nag-aanyaya. Kaya naman agad bumitaw ang aking kanang kamay sa kanyang dibdib at dumulas papunta sa kanyang panty.
Una kong nakapa ang kanyang mamawis-mawis na bulbol. Bumaling naman muli ang mukha ni Patricia sa akin at muli kaming nag-halikan. Tinanggal niya ng tuluyang ang pagka butones ng kanyang damit at kaagad din naman puma-ilalaim ang aking kaliwang palad sa dibdib niya.
Kulang pa ito sa kanya kaya itiniklop niya ang bra pataas kaya’t tuluyang kumawala ang kanyang mga suso. Dahil dito, ang kaliwang kamay ko ay malayang gumapang at salitang sinakmal-sakmal ang mga suso ni Patricia.
“Oohh, God!” “uuhhm,” “ahhh,” “uhmmm,” ang mga haling-hing na kumawala sa kanya.
I reached further down at umusad paloob ng panty niya ang aking kanang kamay. “Uhmmm” na mariin ang ungol niya nang aking napisil ang kanyang tinggil.
Dumulas paibaba at dinakma ng tuluyan ng aking mga daliri ang puki niya at ramdam ko ang labis na pagkabasa ng kanyang hiyas.
The tips of my fingers circled her wet and swollen labias while I caressed her breasts and while we kissed. My fingers slid back and forth and made small circles on her clit.
Momentarily, she broke away from my kiss, lifted her butt, and further lowered her jeans. Her panty slid down along with her jeans, and her pubic hairs were exposed. Patricia lowered her jeans until her butt and hips were unclothed.
The tips of my right index and middle fingers continued rubbing her slit and clit when we resumed kissing.
“Ahh,” “Ahh,” Ahh,” “Uhhmm,” “Uhhmm,” “Oh, fuck.” “Uhhmm,” “Oohh,” “Aahh…”
Nanatili ang aking kaliwang palad sa pag-sakamal sa kanyang kaliwang suso at ang aking mga daliri sa pag-pisil sa kanyang utong. Pinuntirya na aking kanang daliri ang kanyang tinggil at sabay naglaro ang aking mga kamay at daliri sa suso at puki ni Patricia.
“Oohh,” “Shit” “Shit” “Shiit,” “Ahh,” “Ahh,” “Hmmm…”
Tuloy lamang ang aking mga kamay hanggang sa tuluyang din pumiglas sa aking halik si Patricia. She leaned her head to me, and I could see her eyes firmly closed and her mouth opened in excitement and pleasure.
“Hhmm,” “Hmmm,” “Hmmm,” “Oh, fuck,” “Shit ang sarap.” “Ohh,” “Ohh,” “Ahh…”
Tuloy lamang ang halik sa kanyang pisngi at leeg habang abala ang aking mga kamay sa pag-hipo at pag-papasarap sa kanya. Hindi naman mapirme ang ulo niya. Minsan liliyad ang leeg o kaya naman bibiling sa kanan o bibiling sa kaliwa. Napapasarap naman lalo ang pag-salat ko sa kanya kapag lilingon muli sa akin at kami’y maghahalikan.
Kakaiba ang sarap ng kanyang laway at bibig. Ang lasa nito ay yung bang tipong nag-lakad ako ng dalawang oras sa gilid ng isang burol o sa paanan ng bundok at nakarating sa isang mababaw ngunit malinaw na umaagos na tubig.
At sa sobrang uhaw ay hihigop at lulunok ng malamig na tubig mula sa batis—At kung ano ang pakiramdam sa dagliang pagpawi ng uhaw ay ganun ang pakiramdam sa pag-halik kay Patricia.
Nang bigla kong idiniin ang aking daliri sa kanyang tinggil at pina-ikot ikot sa ibabaw nito, napakagat sa aking labi si Patricia, “uhmmm,” “uhmmm,” “uhmmm,” ang kanyang halinghing habang dikit ang aming bibig.
Sinabayan kong laruin ang kanyang utong at pagkiskis sa kanyang tinggil kaya’t napabitaw siya sa aking labi muli, “Ohh,” “Ohh, “Ohh…”
Limalim din ang paghinga ni Patricia at nang aking bilisan ang pagkiskis sa kanyang perlas, ay umi-iksi nang umi-iksi at bumubulis na din ang kanyang pag-hinga.
“Hmmm,” “Hmmm,” “Hmmm,” “Hmmm,” ang ungol niya habang ang mga mata’y pikit na mahigpit. Kunot ang noo’t ilong nang biglang manginig ang kanyang baba sa marahang pagbukas ng kanyang bibig.
Napaliyad ang kanyang leeg at napadiin ang ulo sa akin dibdib at pati ang kanyang ungol na, “aaahhh,” ay may pagkanginig na din nang siya’y tuluyang sapian ng kanyang unang orgasmo.
Hindi tumigil ang paglaro ng aking mga daliri sa kanyang utong at tinggil habang siya’y nilalabasan, “Ahh!” “Ahh!” “Ahh!” “Uhmm,” “Uhhmm,” “Uhhmm,” “Uhhmmm…”
At nang aking natansya na abot na niya ang sukdulan, pinisil ko ang kanyang kaliwang suso at dumulas naman paloob ang aking kanang kamay sa kanyang puki at ipinasok ko ang dulo ng aking dalawang daliri hanggang sa kaya kong maabot mula sa bukan…