Umbrellas

This was a story I’ve written 11 years ago…
It’s my second story but I consider it the most precious.

This was posted in other sites so some old timers may have already read this. I just want to share this here for those who haven’t.

This does not have erotic contents. So if it’s what your after, you can hit the back button now. 🙂

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“Umbrellas”

Why is it so hard to say goodbye to the ones we love? Is saying “Goodbye” as hard as saying “I love you”?
Or is it harder?

Is it because we don’t want to hurt that person?
Or we just don’t want to hurt ourselves?

Or maybe we’re just afraid that we might not be able to stand for it. We’re afraid that after saying goodbye, we’ll find ourselves running back to that person.

But what if we can no longer go back even if we wanted to?

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In a private room of a Japanese restaurant…

“Why are you doing this to me? Anong kasalanan ko sayo para saktan mo ‘ko ng ganito?” Tears roll down Jamie’s cheeks as she begs for an answer.

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I can’t tell you now pero I’m doing this all for you.” Xander’s head is just bowed low. Tears are also starting to fill his eyes.

“All for me? Pinagpalit mo ko sa iba and it was for me?” Cried Jamie as she wipes her tears.

“I’m sorry. Maiintindihan mo rin when the right time comes.” He closed his eyes to stop his tears from falling.

“I know na malaki yung atraso ko sayo. I have been very busy. I know masyadong kulang yung time na binibigay ko sayo. Pero you know na I’m doing my best to make it up to you everytime we meet. Bakit mo nagawa sakin to?”

“I’m really sorry, Jamie. I’m really sorry… We are in a long distance relationship, maraming bagay na nangyayari in a week or two na hindi tayo nagkakasama. I’m sorry…”

“I have been loyal to you. Pero ikaw? You always say you love me.”

“I really love you. I’m sorry…”

“Puro ka sorry, puro ka sorry. Wala ka na bang alam sabihin kundi sorry???”

“I’m sorry kung puro sorry lang yung nasasabi ko sayo sa ngayon. Maiintindihan mo rin ako one day…”

“Bakit hindi pa ngayon? I don’t know kung paanong para sa kabutihan ko yung ginawa mo. Pinalitan mo ko habang tayo pa.”

“I can’t tell you now…”

“I’m willing to listen. Bakit hindi mo pa sabihin ngayon para matapos na? You’re only hurting me more…”

“I’m sorry…”

====

About a month before…

“Sweetie is there something wrong? Parang matamlay ka?” Asked Jamie.

“Wala Hon, I’m just tired. Sige, I’ll go my way na…” He kissed her on the cheeks and started to walk away.

She held him by the arm, “Sweetie, I know there’s something wrong. Why don’t you tell me? Maybe I can help…”

“Kaw talaga Hon. There’s nothing wrong. Pagod lang talaga ko. Don’t worry yourself.” He held her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Sure ka Sweetie?”

“Yes I’m sure.” He gave her another kiss. This time on her forehead. Then he whispered “I love you so much. Always remember that…”

“I love you too, Sweetie.”

And they parted ways…

====

A week after…

They set to meet in a restaurant.
Jamie cancelled all her appointments because she’s really excited to see her love. She arrived earlier so she saw Xander as he entered.

And she was really surprised…

“Hi. Kanina ka pa?” Asked Xander.

“Di naman. Who’s she?” She was staring at the lady beside Xander, whose hand was holding Xander’s arm.

“Ahm Jamie, si Sarah. Sarah si Jamie.”

“Hi.” Greeted Sarah.

Jamie just nodded.
She stared at the lady standing beside Xander. She’s pretty and it’s easy to tell that she has foreign blood.

Her look returned at Xander. “You never said that you’re going to take someone with you.” Her heart now starting to beat faster.

Xander pulled a seat for Sarah and he took another and sat beside her.

This made Jamie’s heart beat even faster. She knows something bad is going to happen. To her at least.

She gathered all her strength to open her mouth and asked…

“What’s this?” She asked in the calmest voice she could pull out of her throat.

“Kumain ka na ba? Would you like to order something first?” Xander asked in return.

“I asked you, what’s the meaning of this? Bakit ka may kasamang babae sa date natin at bakit ka sa kanya ka tumatabi?!” She asked in a now louder voice.

Xander took a deep breath and re. I’ll go straigto the point…”

Jamie held her breath. Trying to prepare herself for something she already have a hint of…

“Sarah is 9 weeks pregnant…” Xander started.

Jamie felt a hard pinch to her heart upon hearing those words…

But nothing could ever prepare her for the next two words that came out of Xander’s mouth…

“By me…”

Silence…

It was almost just a whisper but it came like thunder into Jamie’s ears.

Her eyes started to moist. She bit her lower lip but a whimper still escaped from her throat.
She looked at him, he evaded her stare.
Then at Sarah, whose head was already bowed low since Xander started talking.

“So that’s what’s wrong…” Was all that she could say.

She picked up her bag and stood up.
She walked for the door but he held her by the arm…

“Jamie…”

“I’m ok. Please let me go…” She tried to release her arm from his grip but Xander did not let it go.

“I said let me go!” And she gave him a slap in the face. She stared at him but he couldn’t meet her stare. So he just let go of her arm…

“So that’s what you can’t tell me last week…” She said to him before she walked towards the door and went out.

Tears flowing uncontrollably down her face. She was gasping for air…

Xander just stood there. His head bowed low. People in the restaurant are now staring at him. He grabbed Sarah’s hand and led her out of that place when someone called from behind…

“Sir yung inorder nyo po hindi pa bayad!” Yelled the waiter.

He took out his wallet and pulled out two 500 peso bills and placed it on the table. Then they headed for the door…

======

Jamie was miserable for days after that incident. She can’t believe this happened to her. After everything they’ve been through. Just when she thought that their relationship was strong. Just when she thought she had loved the perfect man. Just when she thought that he loved her too. That he was loyal to her.

She would find out that he had been cheating all along. That everything he had shown her were fake and everything he had told her were lies…

For more than a week she was like an empty shell. She goes to work, does her job, but talks to no one. Not even her friends and family could comfort her.

After work she goes straight to her apartment. Where she would just lay down her bed and stare at the ceiling. Just stare at it thinking of nothing.

Her mind is so tired of thinking about everything that had happened that whenever she tries to think of it again, her mind would just go blank. Until tears start rolling down her cheeks and she starts crying again until she falls asleep…

===

After days of crying and mourning for her broken heart, she just thought she needed to talk to Xander about what happened.

She needed an answer.
She wanted to know what made him do it.

She knew she had imperfections but she knew they weren’t a problem.
Not to Xander.

She can’t believe this happened all of a sudden. Just weeks ago everything seemed to be perfect for the two of them…

She gave Xander a ring and they agreed to meet in a Japanese restaurant.

It was exactly 9pm. Xander was already there when she arrived. It was a small room with a low table in the middle. A typical Japanese dining room.

When she saw him, she couldn’t believe how he had changed. He looked as if he hasn’t eaten for days. He also looked pale. There are dark areas under his eyes. It seems he has been awake since the last time they met.

There was a pinch in her heart upon seeing him like that.
But she also felt that he deserves to be like that after everything he had done to her.

But she missed him a lot. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and kiss him but she knew she shouldn’t do it anymore…

There they talked. She asked for an answer. She begged for it. But all Xander could ever say was “Sorry”…

She entered that place hoping for an answer and she left it still clueless of what had really happened…

==

She is now outside on the streets, waiting for a cab.
She left him inside the restaurant when she knew she wouldn’t get any decent answer from him.
All he could say was that he’s sorry.

She was still thinking about it when rain suddenly poured without notice. And it’s starting to pour harder.

But she did nothing to cover herself. Nor did she run for a shelter.
She just stood there, as if letting the rain drown all the pain in her heart and hide the tears in her eyes.

It’s good to feel the little droplets of water falling on her head, shoulders and face. Her clothers are starting to get soaked. She’s starting to get cold but it was nothing compared to the emptiness she’s been having in her heart for days…

Then suddenly she felt the rain had stopped pouring on her.
She looked left and right but saw that it’s still raining on the streets.
Then she looked up and saw an open umbrella over her head.
She quickly turned around and…

“Xander…?”

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“Umbrellas” Part 2

She looked behind her and she bumped on the chest of the man holding the umbrella.
She lost her balance.

Instinctively, the left arm of the man quickly held her by the waist to catch her.
She felt little bolts of electricity as the hand of the man touched her back. Her blouse was a bit wet and cold so she could feel the warmth of his palm…

She looked up to see his face…

“Xand…” She stopped. It wasn’t Xander. It was a just stranger who probably saw her just standing under the rain.

She looked into his eyes and she saw something in it. She saw worry in his eyes…
Worry and something else. She didn’t know what it was but she knew there was something else…

“Are you okay, miss?” Asked the stranger.

She regained balance and stood straight. But the man’s hand was still on her back. She could still feel it’s warmth and it feels like burning.

“I’m fine. You can let go of me now.”

“Oh I’m sorry.” The man pulled his hand from her back.
“I’m Jake, by the way.” And held out his hand to her. It was the left hand.

“Oh…” And he transferred the umbrella he was holding to his left hand. Which got them both open for the pouring rain.

“Oh…” As he quickly raised the umbrella again but it was too late because they already got wet.

“I’m sorry.” And he held out his hand again. This time it was the right hand. “I’m Jake.” He smiled.

The man reacted funny so a little smile broke out of Jamie’s face without her knowing.

“Maganda ka pala kapag nakangiti.”

That’s when she noticed that she was smiling. She felt really good that second. It’s been a while since she last smiled. It’s as if she was released of half the burden she had been carrying.

She looked at the man’s hand. She hesitated for a while, but then she felt she owed this man something. He doesn’t seem to be an opportunist. She was sure that what she saw in his eyes was real. So she took his hand and…

“I’m Jamie… Thanks sa payong ha. At sa pagsalo.” And she smiled again.

And it was the start of their beautiful friendship.

====

Jamie and Jake became friends and they go out every now and then.

Whenever she’s with him, she felt like no pain could ever hurt her. As if she could stand strong against every storm.

But when she’s back to being alone, everything would just come back.
All the pain would start hurting her again. She realized that she still loves Xander. And it still hurts when the restaurant incident flashes back in her mind.

=

“Damn you Xander. How could you do this to me…” She said to herself one lonely afternoon. She can’t help thinking about it everytime she’s on her bed and stares at the ceiling.

“I hate you for all the pain you have caused me. But I hate myself more for still loving you…” And tears started filling her eyes again…

Then her phone rang. She looked at the screen and saw it was Jake.

She sat on her bed, took a deep breath, and…

“Hello?” She answered. In the calmest voice she can.

“Hi there, Miss…” Answered Jake.

“Bakit ka tumawag?” She asked.

“I just miss that beautiful voice.”

“Haha. Wala kong piso.” Her lips curved.

“And I miss the beautiful owner of that voice more.”

“Dalawang piso na utang ko sayo.” Now she’s smiling.

“Kuripot mo naman. Dalawang piso lang?”

“Haha. Di nga, bakit ka tumawag?”

“Busy ka ba?”

“Hmmm… Teka check ko sched ko.”

“Asus me ganun pa? Dinner tayo. Treat ko.”

“Hmmm… Sige, I’ll just cancel my meeting with Barrack Obama. Pati yung date ko with Robert Pattinson.” Now she’s grinning.

“Wow tikas. Haha. Daanan kita dyan ha. Mga seven.”

“Ok po.”

“Sige, see you later.”

“Bye.” And their short conversation ended.

She laid down on her bed again. She saw the ceiling once more.
Then she tried to search her heart for the pain she was feeling just seconds ago, but couldn’t feel a pinch.

She couldn’t believe that Jake was able to take away all those pain in just a minute of telephone conversation.

“Pano mo ba nagagawa yun Jake?” She asked herself.

====

4 months quickly passed since they met.

They’re having a candle light dinner in a fancy restaurant. Their first time since they met.

She knew something was coming. And she’s ready for it. She already have an answer for it.
But she still doesn’t want to expect.

“Hmm, why did you bring me here?” Asked Jamie.

“For a change.” Jake answered.

“Sus, nakakapanibago ka. Buti nalang nagskirt ako kung hindi baka di ako pinapasok.” Then sipped champagne.

“Ahm Jamie…” Taking something out from the pocket of his pants.

“Yes?” She took another sip. Her heart now pounding.

“I have something to offer you.” Then he brought out a brochure and handed it to Jamie.

“Ano to?” She took the brochure and looked…